I know what you mean. I was a total wreck from the moment I found out about all this. The local law enforcement was trying to serve me the court papers cuz H was not around. I felt like ripping his head off. He is lucky he wasn't around or there would have been something broken or hurt. I was that livid and hurt beyond belief. All we can do is wait. I guess this is no real help other than you are definitely not alone and you can vent away. That is what this group was made for. Does it get easier? No, also depending on the nature of the "it" beast or whats her face. In my situation she would not let up on contact. I still don't know if they talk. I think it will only get worse because the kid will start to ask questions more and more. Good luck and vent away.

They are homewreckers, and what kills me is that our H went along with it. The ow is due in April in our case. It's been quiet for the last month since she told me she was going to raise the child alone. My H doesn't know what he is going to do when it makes it's appearance. We go to marriage counseling once a week, and it helps for the moment. When I go home and settle down for the night the reality of it all hits home. I was really upset the other night and told my H to go back to his whore and bastard child that's coming. I know it's not the child's fault, but I feel like I didn't ask for this. My children and I don't deserve this and it's not our fault. I feel the same as you, almost like it's a countdown to D-day. I ask myself if the next few months will be the last of our marriage, is it a countdown to the end? will he go to the hosp. if she calls when it's born? will he walk away from it? I drive myself crazy with these never ending questions and what ifs. I love him, but hate him at the same time. Please let me know if you find something that helps! I feel alone at times, and it's heartwrenching to wake up each morning. Venting helps, but it seems to consume my life at times. I continue to live in a state of confusion.....

Damn, damn, daang! I hate being the bearer of bad news. But, maybe it aint "bad" maybe it is a blessing in disguise to give ya'll sitah's a heads up on these sorry-ass hoes. I feel ya'll on what ya'll wrote. My dumb-ass husbands hoe said the same sorry-ass shit. She said, "I don't want no child support, I want to raise him on my own, I don't need ya'll help, I just want full custody and I'll go away quietly". NOT!!!
That skanky-ass, trivelin bitch served papers on him for full custody and maximum child support. Over $1600.00 a month this tramp got! Then she NEVER left us the fuck alone.
I couldnt take it anymore. And my sorry-ass husband was such a weak bastard that he let her bitch, badger, and bully him in court until his weak ass started seeing her again.
Damn! Looks like ya'll are not the only one "venting" and "livid" as hell right about now. I need these feelings to fight his and his whores fire, with my fucking bad-ass blowtorch. I know. It's a damn shame, but that's what it is. Nuff, said. Stay strong, sistahs.

Thanx shadow for telling it like it is. Yeah, that slut said the same thing.......saying she just wanted to know who the father was and nothing else.......NOT..............and now we are here getting sucker punched and beatin down.......but HELL......we are getting right back up and getting stronger each time. Lets show these whores who the real WOMEN are ..........not like these animals we have to keep at bay with whips and chains.

I'm right there with you SD. Don't ever forget these are home wreckers. They really should have no place in our lives. My H's OW said the same ol thing...no money needed I'llraise him on my own. Yup she went after himn for CS and then has used this kid to get to my H's heart. Amethyst, if your H's OW does the right thing..she will let her present H think this is his child. Honestly that is the best chance you have. I pray she does not let her dirty secret out. From what I've seen here on this website...those who have no contact seem to do be doing the best. Those of us who thought our hearts were big enough for this are learning the very hard way....this is not easy.

As I told my H, if that kid is his, I am leaving. The only way I would consider staying is if the OW gave up all rights to the child. I really don't think that will happend. LOL But that is my choice, I will not help him raise his maistake and everytime he looks at that child he will be reminded why his world crashed down around him and I will be free to live my life with out his drama from the other momma. It is just like a count down 39 days to go......... My last question is do I push having a DNA test done even if the OW never pushes it. I don't know if I am okay with not knowing for sure.

Okay, why did the same thing happen to all of us? Damn,shame how much these "homewreckers" (not forgetting what they are Pillar,thanks for the reminder) can just lie their homewrecking-asses off. Hearttorn,I'm glad that you are dusting yourself off and getting right back up. "Girl-friend",that's what you gotta do, cuz Lord only knows the longer you stay down the harder it is to get back up.
Amethyst,it sounds good to me that the ow has her husband. Cuz if she didn't she'd be homeing in on your husband trying to plot and scheme on how she could wreck your marriage and home to get YOUR man, so you could be as miserable as that bitch.
I asked my stbx to get a blood test done and his stupid ass never did and just got mad that I wanted him to. Truth said,to many folks think that one of the kids she is claiming is his, don't look a damn thhing like him.
Amethyst, do you REALLY want to know??? Why don't you think about what you have to gain or how it will affect you knowing vs not knowing. Write out a sort of pro/con list. I do this often. Get back with us and let us know what you came up with. Take your time, girl. I know this is so hard for you, hun. Sorry that you even have to go thru all this drama and heartache. Lots of love, Shadowdancer.

The reason I am not sure if i'm okay with not knowing for sure is if things don't work out for the OW and her H, that leaves it open for her to claim the baby is my H in the future, and I would hate to be back on track and moving on creating a life with my H again, just to have that homewrecking slut come and derail us again. Right now me and my H are working things out, but I have also seperated all money and bills like it would have been when we were dating, I don't want to start co-mingling them again if there is the chance I could be leaving. I would hate to invest 5 more years of my life to him, just to have her take it all away again. Not that he would leave me for her (at least that is what he says) but it would just make things clearer for me.

I am sorry for all of us. This is just bull shit. What happenend to the days that the major issue in peoples lives were trying to get your mate to help around the house or things like that. Now here we are married and still having to wait and find out how are husband and thier whores want to handle things that effect our lives. This is just crazy!

honesty1-you hit the nail on the head. why are we suffering while they play puppetier(sp?) with our lives. what kind of twisted shit is this.