You have to do what works for you and your husband. Forget what everyone else thinks. If they can't respect that then, maybe they should be cut off. I'm in a similar situation. My husband chooses NC as well and quite frankly, I'M GLAD! Everyone keeps talking about what is fair for the OC, but what about the LEGITIMATE kids and the WIFE? I have two kids with my husband and we are not ready to tell them about the OC yet. Eventually we will, but not now. So just because the OW feels it's time for OC to meet his siblings, I'm suppose to change my life around and pull the rug from under my kids feet??? Hell NO! Stay strong TormentedHeart. It is no one elses business how you and your husband decide to live your life. And with all due respect, even your mother in law.

Thanks, a part of me knows that...another part just feels helpless. He and I are living separately right now and its been hard because I'm in one place 4 hours away my children are in another and he is somewhere...we are scattered, I'm living with family... I have thought about going back but I get a lot of flack about how I'm destroying my kids by going back (esp without a job)...I know I sound easily influenced...this is just such a taboo situation that until I found this site no one could relate with me.

Tormented, i feel really bad for you. You should not be going through this while pregnant it is twice as hard. Forget MIn law. Forget OW comments. I would actually b glad to know she is hating you the wife. Let her post it online. Please try to enjoy your pregnancy. If H wants in with u. And out with OC. Let it be and be toguether. It would b better that way for your recovery. I hope you guys reunite. It sux.
We have all heard it before and lived through this. Voice your anger here and we will do our hearfelt best to guide u. I was prego both times my H messed around w OW. We have contact w OC and I managed to say F...everybody. He wants me so we are sticking it out. Good luck sweety.

Thank you so much! I needed that. It is hard and it seems that more people (celebrity status) are coming out with situations like this. I hate hearing it on the radio about the innocent OC and about how stupid we are if we stay and how selfish if we make them choose (which I think making them choose is rarely any of our cases)...

I'm with you on the mother in law part! my husband confided in my mother in law before he told me about the OW/OC situation. In our case OW didn't know if my husband was the father or someone else. So when we first found out that she had the baby and tested the other man and he wasn't the father my mother in law was there telling me it'll be ok and the kid probably wasn't my husbands anyways cause she's obviously a whore.

But when the DNA test came back she changed her tune. We also have NC (my husbands decision also) and he asked her not to contact OW at all. She complied for a few months then decided it was eating her alive not having a relationship with OC, she she reached out and friended her on FB and Instagram. We've since disowned my MIL. I'm sad because I loved her and thought her loyalty would be to me and her son, but she proved us wrong.

My MIL also didn't raise my husband and has 2 other children she's put up for adoption and has no relationship with still now (even though she's talked to them both as adults). So it's hard for me to understand why it's so hard for her to not have contact with OC (especially sine OC isn't even 1yo yet)

I don't understand them...never will...There's no reason for them to be so nasty towards us...