A couple of years ago, a close friend (whom I had gone to school with as a kid and whom had even lived with us at one point) told me she was pregnant. I went through the usual congratulations and discussed her pregnancy with her. A couple of months later, when she found out the child's gender, she told me the baby's father decided to leave her, because he already had three children of the same gender! I was taken back a bit... we're young. Three children for a man told me that he was either a player or he was older. But she never let up any information about him. So I just gave her my support and she prepared for life as a single mother.

Six months ago, I discovered that the father of her pre-schooler is, in fact, married. Has always been married. How did I find this out? My friend let it slip how angry she was that the child's father wasn't going to take her to Disney World with his other three children because his wife said no. Um, what? She went on and on about how mean his wife is, how she won't accept her child, and how my friend has done this, that, and the other to try and get on the woman's good side. She told me that she even sent his wife a "Happy Mother's Day Step Mommy" card. All I could do was imagine if H's OC sent me a card like that. Of course, our circumstances aren't the same... but still. I suppose it depends on the person.

This man moved his family far away from his work. His job works long hours, though, so on nights when he was too tired to drive allll the way out to where he had moved them, he would go sleep at my friend's house, and they would, of course, have sex. That's how her pregnancy came about. She expected his wife to leave him when she found out, but she didn't.

After the family returned from their Disney World trip, my friend called me in complete hysterics when she discovered that his wife is pregnant AGAIN with their fourth child. My friend was enraged. She screamed, she tantrumed, she threw things, she said some very scary things... in the end she just sat on the floor and cried.

When their child was born, she exploded with anger and hateful things to say. She blew up the husband's phone and all of our's, as well as our social media sites.

Today, she e-mailed me to vent some more about the H and his wife. She's angry that her child doesn't have their own room when they go over there two weekends out of the month, but they have the nerve to give the new baby it's own room. About how her child has been around longer and how unfair it is. She talked about how ugly his wife is, sent me pictures of her and her children she lifted from online. She talked about going to the state to force him to pay support and a custody agreement now because she wants to light a fire under their asses (she has been accepting anything he can give her money-wise instead of a regulated payment. She tells him what she needs and he gets it for her. When her car died, he brought her his extra vehicle without his wife's knowledge. She is still driving it around.)

And then she finished off by saying "If he and I can stop fighting, he'll come back to me. And then I'll send her more pictures and texts and NOT tell him this time."

This friend is not aware of our circumstances. In fact, almost everyone in our lives are unaware with the exception of a couple of friends we had our initial traumatic breakdowns with. I'm trying to maintain the calm friend composure, while playing devil's advocate to get her to see what may be going on in that house and in their minds... while trying to prevent myself from screaming at her.