Hi Mari,

Honestly it sounds like you have a pretty good hold on it already. I think when he gets a little older you can open up to him more. Be honest with him, I don't want him thinking you are the bad guy. It's a hard reality for such a little guy but it'll make him stronger in the end. I bet you he'll never leave his kids because he knows the pain it causes.

Warm regards,
Brock

I completely understand where you are coming from...my girls ask for / cry for daddy all the time, and yet, he isn't there.

Im sorry your ex is doing this to his son, its not right. Hopefully your son will grow up knowing that what his father did, is not the right thing to do to a child. Parents should always be there for the kids they created.

It's very hard I'm going through it now. First I've been sober for 3 month before that I used the whole time of whatever u would call that kind of parenting. I got clean my mind was clear and I knew my son was hurting. This is how I got help I got a life coach male bc my son is male he helps my child with anger management and every other week the go to park or play basketball. It's not a dad but what it is is a older male man that our kids miss. He charges me based on income try that and goodluck

My boys' dad left when they were 5 and 9. They are now 11 and 15. They do get to see their dad about 3 times a year. Token visits. It's more than nothing, but enough to rub salt in the wound and remind everyone involved he's not being a real dad.
Every boy deals with it differently. My oldest just goes along because of the younger one now, he acts as his protector. But really doesn't care to see his dad anymore. The younger one often asks about him, asks to call him, and tries to spark the relationship into more than it is or probably ever will be. My ex just isn't capable of having relationships anymore. So I always tell my boys that he is missing out on some great kids.There is nothing in the world that they have done to make him leave or not come back around. That's all him and his own personal issues.
There are so many great things about our children that their daddies are missing out on, some great fun, some great learning and growing as families, and some really great love. It's baffling to me, it makes no sense at all, and that's just what I tell them. And unfortunately there is nothing we can do to change the situation. It is what it is and we have to work around it.
All the best to you and your little one. Hugs.

Father of my child disappeared when I was pregnant also and die not see child. I guess we have to try to find some normal men to be father figure for children. It is unknown what is better for child that his dead disappeared or if child woukd have to grow near such negative example as his dead. May be it is better that grandfather was around not father. God knows what is best for children. I am upset that man disappeared but I think that my child may not lost anything from not having real father drug abuser around.

Few of us are dealt a whole deck of cards.

For me, 3 of my 4 grandparents died before I was born. I had one aunt and one uncle. Both had their kids young and had grandchildren older than me. My last grandmother was closer to her great-grandchildren then to me. So essentially I had no family other than my parents and sister. My parents fought all of the time, and I was my sister's punching bag... Great childhood?...not

My kids had their dad leave when they were young.

My ex's brother is going through a divorce.

So, ya know, stuff happens. We all want better for our kids, but only the lucky few get it.

On the other hand, my kids are much more empathetic, grown up, and responsible for all that they've gone through (me too).

So my best advice is to hold onto the good, acknowledge the bad, and hope for the best. You're probably doing much better raising your son than you'd ever thought. I see a bright future.

Patti

I get that one. My kids have told me to go get married lol my youngest has called random men dad. It is heart breaking. I think if you acnoledge every child has struggles but every child's struggle is a different one. You can't help it but you can help him walk through it. Just love him see that its just a barrier a lifevtrial a pain you'll have to get through but there are many good things and good times ahead. O have heard some women say they tried to get a male figure in the child's life such as asking a well trusted male friend to be the God parent. It may help fill a gap just a little bit.

Sometimes, we find ourselves compensating for what they are missing out on. What always helps me through the process, is knowing that what I am doing is good enough. You cannot think about the what ifs and whys. Your child will figure it out sooner than later, that his main support will and always will be you. I always think of parents who stay together, but hate each other, and how badly that can affect the children more. It is true, you and your child are fortunate enough to have good people around and life has filtered all the bad ones out. I wish you both the best!