I doubt its paranoid. Its probably the result of your uneasyness around strangers. Friends friends are strangers. I experinced this over the weekend I went with a friend to a party where I knew no one. He knew most people there, most people there knew each other, not until a gentlemen tood the initative to strike up a conversation with me did my wondering what they were thinking about me thoughts begin to subside.

I always get this. I worry about what people think of me, whether they hate me, find me annoying or weird etc. The thing is, i can't control what others think of me.

I get upset, because i badly want people to like me, and i constantly think "if only i was more pretty",or "if only i was funny" or "if only i was chatty and confident" then people would like me.

Really i can only be myself, whatever that is!

I get this all the time too. Its horrible, and made so much worse when someone says to you that you are very quiet it just makes me even quieter :(

I know exactly how you feel! I always try to be myself, to not be so quiet, and sometimes I really think I'm doing good and then when someone tells me I'm quiet, its so discouraging.
I do not know how it is with everyone, but with myself, I'm really more shy the more people there are around.

the thing that sucks the most is that when I talk to people I get totally ignored like I'm not even there and when I don't talk evrryones all concerned and like OMG why aren't you talking, you need to talk and it gets very confusing

I understand exactly what everyone is saying. I feel almost the same way. I'm a good bit older than you, Karateka, so I don't worry that people might hate me. It's more a feeling that people just won't be interested in what I have to say.

I've had the same experience where I've made an effort to be sociable, but someone who is more loud and outgoing has taken over the conversation and left me as a quiet bystander. Later, someone, maybe even the loud, outgoing person, will mention that I'm really quiet. I feel like, "what am I supposed to do, dance on the table or something." I'd like to be more outgoing, but even if I was as outgoing as I ever wanted to be, I just don't have the need to be the center of attention the way some people do, and I'm not interested in competing to make people notice me.

The strange thing for me is that, even though I'm uncomfortable making small talk in groups of people that I don't know well, I'm just fine in a more structured setting, like a business meeting, where the topic of conversation is more clearly defined. It doesn't bother me at all to give a speech in front of a large group, but ask me to mingle and make small talk with the same people and it's a different story.

So, to answer your question, for some of us, it is normal. Some people are just naturally more outgoing than others. Some of the people who are the most outgoing have much bigger issues than you or I have, and as a result, they need to be the center of attention. All we can do is be ourselves and realize that, in the end, the people who matter don't judge us because we may not be as outgoing as someone else.

Your not being stupid or paranoid...It is natural for you to have those insecure feelings if you have been made to feel that you are doing something wrong by a few ignorant people...

I find it more difficult in a group & meeting new people...I just be myself...accept that I am quiet...If they don't like me cos I am not talking...they are the one with the problem...

If you look around a group of people...you notice that not everyone is out going & chatty...

It is natural to feel this way, or at least it's what a lot of us go through! I do the same thing when I hang out with friends' friends. But what I've found is that when you find yourself inching away, you need to force yourself to inch closer. It's highly uncomfortable, but typically if you at least try to get into the conversation once in a while, there will be a few moments here and there where you will engage them and they will respond to you. If they respond positively (which they most likely will), then you keep at it.

And if they comment on how quiet you are, just remember that to them, they just can't wrap their heads around people who like to be quiet. They aren't able to understand it. I have to work so hard to not be mad at people who remark on my quietness!