Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I have these images and flashes in my head of something that may or may not of happened when I was eight. I don't exactly trust these vague memories becuase it could just all be in my head. My memory skips out a lot during my teen years becuase of what happened then, but what of it skips out there becuase of something that happened that I just don't want to remember?
The memory is a hazy of me and a friend's father sitting in the kitchen when I had gotten up to get some water and he is asking me some odd question. Then he gets up, pulls me towards him, and the memory fades out until the next day when everything feels okay.
When ever i think about it, I instantly get a panic attack and feels nauseous. Any ideas about what I should do?
The memory is a hazy of me and a friend's father sitting in the kitchen when I had gotten up to get some water and he is asking me some odd question. Then he gets up, pulls me towards him, and the memory fades out until the next day when everything feels okay.
When ever i think about it, I instantly get a panic attack and feels nauseous. Any ideas about what I should do?
For example, I called my mom one day and asked if Daddy ever had an old, green pick up truck. She said, "Yes, but we got rid of that truck before you turned 3." I asked if we had a very steep, very short drive way? And was it the kind of truck you had to push a foot pedal down for the brake? And did we have about 3 concrete stairs going up to the front porch with a wrought iron railing that had the black paint peeling off? She confirmed all these details and thought it was strange that I could remember them from such a young age. I didn't get into what else happened in the memory. Just enough to confirm the memory was valid.
For me it always feels like the next day everything is okay because I blocked the memory, didn't think about it, didn't deal with it. I don't know if any of this helps.
You may be able to be hypnotized and recall the events to the counselor who could then later pass the information along to you.
I have very little memory of any of my actual sexual abuse, but, because of my symptoms,( very low self esteem,fear of abandonment, Alcohol abuse, generalized feelings of shame and guilt, lack of trust, and problems with intimate long term relationships, etc ), I just assume I was, and have focused on learning how to not let those symptoms control my life any more.
Life is good today.