Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I wasn't really sure where to put this so I went with here.
When I was younger I somehow taught myself to disassociate from reality, presumably to cope with some kind of trauma, well at the moment I struggle a lot with feeling detached and 'unreal' this becomes particularly bad when doing something I enjoy. Time feels like its passing by too quickly and I am hyper aware that this will all be a memory, that I'll blink and it will be over. And then I'll start to feel unreal.
It kinda means that I can't really enjoy being in the present because I feel like I'm not really there, does that make sense?
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle it/where to post this? My boyfriend is visiting soon and I would like to actually enjoy seeing him and not have to convince myself that I'm real all the time. Any ideas I can give him for how to help?
When I was younger I somehow taught myself to disassociate from reality, presumably to cope with some kind of trauma, well at the moment I struggle a lot with feeling detached and 'unreal' this becomes particularly bad when doing something I enjoy. Time feels like its passing by too quickly and I am hyper aware that this will all be a memory, that I'll blink and it will be over. And then I'll start to feel unreal.
It kinda means that I can't really enjoy being in the present because I feel like I'm not really there, does that make sense?
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle it/where to post this? My boyfriend is visiting soon and I would like to actually enjoy seeing him and not have to convince myself that I'm real all the time. Any ideas I can give him for how to help?
Most people with a continuous dissociation issue will practice grounding themselves to help them learn to stay in the present. Here are some things that can help you do this. When you feel yourself dissociating you can:
*Name everything in the room and touch it as you name it "I am touching the couch. I am touching the wall. I am touching the floor". Continue to do this until the feeling has subsided.
*Eat a strong candy like an Altoids.
If you can, I would start working with a therapist who will probably have many more suggestions on how to deal with dissociation. It does take practice to undo what your body does naturally but you can break the habit. Please try not to be discouraged if these techniques do not work immediately. They will work providing you do them each time you find yourself dissociating but it may take a few months before you see results....but you will see results.
I hope you have a wonderful visit with your boyfriend. :-)
I will talk to my counsellor when I next see her and ask for some help- thank you :)
...is freaky. The way out of it is to get calmed down and get tactile...like grab stuff and feel it with your hands or lightly slap your body all over, or do yoga, or shout, or roll around on the floor, grab an ice cube, take a shower, smell a strong smell...
For me tree bark is really good to grab, grass is good to dig my toes into, rocks are good to grip.
Stuff like that.
https://www.e-tmf.org/downloads/Grounding_Techniques.pdf
This is a good 2 page article about grounding. It will take time to tune in.