Sexual Abuse Support Group

Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...

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Still trudging along

wolverine22
wolverine22
I'm still pushing forward, hoping to rebuild, but not knowing how. I've never dated, and while I have libido, I'm hesitant to ever have sex. I haven't had sex in 2 years. I'm honestly afraid of giving up control. I know I'd make a good boyfriend/husband, but I'm unattractive, but sure attractive enough for my cousin to rape me. Not to mention the fact that I can't be out to my family (I'm gay) and I feel like I've got nothing to live for. Maybe I just need a medication adjustment.
Desigol1979
Desigol1979
It WILL get better, Dude! Trust me!
donnawanda
donnawanda
I'm sorry you're hurting so bad. Please don't give up. Are you in therapy? Therapy can make a big difference in your life. I was suicidal at your age but went on to have a career and a family with a man I love very much. In my case, it all caught up to me because I never dealt with the sexual abuse in my childhood - so I am dealing with it now. But therapy from the age of 19 on is what got me to the point that I could function in my life as well as I did for as long as I did. In one way you are ahead of the game because you already know what you have to heal from, whereas I had forgotten everything. At the same time, that amnesia might have made things easier for me. The point is, you can heal, and you can have a great life, as long as you don't give up. Get help, and don't give up. That's the key point. And share here as much as you like - we understand and we will support you.
wolverine22
wolverine22
Why can't I just be normal? Live a normal life?
lighthouse11
lighthouse11
Sorry you are having it so rough. I was raped for over 3 years by my cousin when I was starting when I was 11. I told my mother and she didn't believe me. At one point I wanted to kill myself, but if you will realize that the is always light at the end of the tunnel and keep pushing on you will get there. I am now 55 and when on to have a great life. Yes it has been a roller coaster of good and bad, but my I have experienced a fulfilled life. I chose not to let the pain that someone caused me, control my future. Yes, I still fight the memories at times, but I have a great support system.
itsnotok
itsnotok
((hugs))

I agree with donnawanda about therapy. Also, you ARE normal. It is completely normal to be hesitant about sex when you were rape. Do not give up.
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