Gradually the wall will come down. And you will find that person who can see past that wall and help you to knock it down. Right now you use it to stop more hurt but you create hurt by using it ( does that make sense?)
Here if you want to talk
It will get better
stay safe xoxoxoxoxox

Counseling should help you with your wall, it will take time, but yes, there is hope!

I hope u get over ur fear so u can enjoy ur life, u deserve that at least.

You will find that safe place insdie you. The you will begin to heal. I encourage you to find a person you feel safe to talk to, write, talk cry, get mad then tear down that barrier.
You will find this, maybe not today or tomorrow, but you will begin to heal :)
Hugs

That wall sucks doesn't it? Yep... I know... You'll always be a little scared, till you get used to the person you're with... each new relationship will scare you to death, but if you hold out it's usually worth it... ^_^

Totally normal to have that wall. Mine is back now and thicker than ever. You will be able to get passed it, over it, through it, whatever. You will. don't worry. and then someday you will meet someone special who hopefully is safe and trustworthy and he won't care about your wall coming up, down, up, down, it will all be a okay. keep up the great work you are doing on your journey of self discovery, love and acceptance. Remember that acceptance one is crucial and is key to being a happier you. Much love, mother duck

I know the feeling - I went through a phase of dating attached/married men cos then I wouldn't have to commit - it only caused more hurt x

they still scare the hell out of me.

I am in a very happy relationship now, i feel very lucky. I was abused on and off for 13 years of my life by my brother who is 10 years older than me. i pretty much thought that all men were scum and I dated a few that were.

If you really want a relationship then go for it, even if it is a little scary at first. You just have to be careful when you are dating. i had trouble with flashbacks of my abuse when I became intimate with my bf at first and that was really scary.

Then I told him about the abuse and now he is so understanding and I feel completely comfortable with him.

You can definitely have a relationship even if it is a little scary at first. Take care.

have you gotten a therapist to woirk this out with you? it took a long time for me to break that wall down but I know you can do it.big hugs from me.

I'll be 35 in a few months and I still can't get over, around, through or past my "wall." I'm working on it in therapy but I don't know if I'll ever get past it. I WANT to ... but I don't trust myself or anyone else enough to let my guard down and let someone in. I have hope, that with a lot of work and some courage I'll be able to let someone love me ... and I'll be able to love him back. Only time will tell...

i've been married over 20yr and i still have a really hard time totally trusting my husband its not him its me. i find myself pushing him away like when he just wants to give me a kiss. i hate it. he knows about everything. i feel so guilty i know he loves me and he tries to understand but its not easy all because of the assholes in my past thanks alot jerks.

have you tried abuse counselling? I have just attended a workshop with other women and was taught how a healthy relationship should be as opposed to an abusive one as how else do we know whats normal or not? Good luck

i think if you want one, you will have one one day. it's a big step to even WANT one so i definitely think you're heading in the right direction.