To be completely honest, until I forgave my dad (the abuser) and gave 100% control of my pain, past and ugliness of it all over the God I wasn't handling it well at all on my own. I felt stuck all the time, felt like I had split personality disorder where I was to put on a happy "normal" face for everyone, while I was dying a little more each and every day living it over and over.

I chose to forgive, not because he deserved it, because he didn't. But neither did I. I didn't deserve forgiveness of my sins but God sent His son to take mine upon himself so that I could be free from the weight of my poor choices. Once I realized this, I realized that out of an act of love and obedience to God and knowing this was what he commanded me to do,... to forgive... not because He wanted to punish me or make me mad about having to forgive, but that it would set me free from the pain of the past and set my dad free to be worked upon by God, not me withholding forgiveness and causing even more pain and suffering for us all. I had to forgive over and over and over again. Each time ugly thoughts or ugly memories came up in my mind, I willfully chose to forgive and then each time it felt like a giant weight was lifted off my shoulders. The more I did it the easier the next time was to keep doing it. Instead, in the past, I would dwell upon the memories until I was tortured in my mind. This way, I gave it room to exist, yet cast it down the right way by giving it over to God the Father to take off of me and for him to exact His punishment upon my dad, not me. I was set free.
I hope you can find some value in this. It was truly transformational for me to go through this process. I know of no counseling, book or therapy that works better than forgiveness. I pray you find your peace in this whole thing. Know you are not alone.

Thank you very much for sharing. Thank you for being so open. I have a therapist but just cannot get the weight of the trauma off of me. I will try to hand it over to God.

Hello! I just wanted to agree that forgiveness helped me also, and talking to God and telling him how I felt. Also journaling, helps and it's a nice way to be able to keep a paper trail in order to look back at your transformation. And also having a routine and self care helped. For me I started yoga and exercising more, and trying new hobbies. It was really a combination of all of those things, but God was the foundation of all of it. Keep going! I'm praying for you and I know that you will be able to overcome this! I have just started a Facebook group called conquerors over sexual assault if you would like to join!