Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I happened to come upon this support group and I've never seen anything like it so I actually joined because i just need to know I'm not alone. I was born into a family that did not love me. They didn't think i was worth anything even as a baby because my older brother had a bright personality and I did not. They did the bare minimum to keep me alive. Other than that, I was ignored. When my dad left my undeniably insane mother he fought for custody of my brother and my brother only. He ended up not winning and left us with her. For 3 years she would drop us off with random people and leave us behind for months and no one told me where she was. When I was with her she was either sleeping or on the computer. One day she ups and moves us to a whole new city to start her life with her new boyfriend. When he comes to live with us he started molesting me. I have very few memories of the time but I know it started when I was 6. Around age 11 I told my mother what was happening and she told me never to speak to anyone else about it and God will heal. When that turned out not to work I told her again and she stayed silent. He lived with us until i was 13 and called CPS. They removed him from the house but left me there with my mother who constantly tried to make me have a relationship with him. In the end she forced me to sign an affidavit of non prosecution against him and he remains out of jail to this day. At 13 I also got into an extremely abusive relationship that lasted for 3 years. I had a child with him and my mother would force me into my room and let her husband come over. I could not get out of the room and I could constantly hear my child screaming... I called CPS again and was placed into foster care until they found my dad. I gave my child up for adoption because i wanted them to have a better life and not be touched by any of this. Eventually my dad decided i was too hard to handle because i had emotional problems from constant abuse and neglect and he abandoned me once more. I was forced to turn back to my mother who i still financially depend on. I'm taking steps to get away and cut my entire family off for good. My entire family hates me because I dont hide my past or my emotional problems. They refuse to give me decent support because I am not a Christian and I'm also a lesbian. I just need to know I'm not alone.
Also I'm sorry this turned out so long. This is actually a very very condensed version.
I financially depended on my parents for a long time. It was a huge relief when that changed. It changed because I have a pension from disability insurance now. I can only recommend you to try and get some social insurance. Sometimes NGO's offer help with all the paper work and even financial help as an intermediatery solution.
I, too cut contact with my family. My situation there is somewhat different from yours, but still. Was it hard? No, honestly, not in the end. It was a bit hard because it meant giving up the hope that they would change, but I was much more relieved than sad. I can't say I miss them. For me, it was a good step, I need to stay away from them for my own healing.
You've had to take some terribly difficult decisions - and you've shown a lot of courage. Telling your mother, calling CPS. I'm sorry you've had to give up your child for adoption but I believe it was a very brave and responsible thing to do.
Take care, empatheticgirl. We're here if and whenever you want to "talk".
You are definitely not alone! I to went through an abusive childhood that was nothing less than one nightmare after another. I am so sorry that you had to go through that, no one should have to endure that kind of pain. One thing to remember today is that you are special, and a survivor. You have the ability to become full of goodness and are full of special gifts. I say this because we give to one another. Feel free to read my story and know there are many of us finding our way. Your story is not long, your story is you! There are many good people in the world too, never forget that; you are meeting some of them right here. I can so relate as I am gay and my family didn't and doesn't accept me either (family in the mom, dad, and brothers). But I have children who love me and accept me for who I am, just as I love and accept them for who they are today. The good that I didn't receive as a child I am receiving today from my new family and friends. Not only do I receive, but I am capable of giving. You are in good company...
Brent