Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I am never free of the abuse. I have found a wonderful guy that loves me and would never hurt me but i'm always keeping him at arms length. Just being in his arms and kissing him i start getting panicky and mentally withdraw. I've had flashbacks and nightmares. I love this guy, and i've told him the bare minimum of my past childhood abuse but i don't think he really understands why i''m like this. I've told him we need to move slower so i don't mentally withdraw and go comatose. Help? how do i overcome this and explain it better to him and find a way for us to work it out
It will take time and help.
Overcoming sexual abuse, as bluedragon41 said, requires time and help. Are you working with a qualified therapist? I hope so because as far as I know, healing the wounds of sexual abuse is a real paradox; healing requires the help of others, yet is something no one can do for us.
For me, that paradox has meant that I would seek the help of a qualified therapist and then either use what was offered or not.
You say you want to explain why you are the way you are but don't think he really understands. He may find Laura Davis' book called, Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love was Sexually Abused as a Child, helpful in understanding where you're coming from.
I hope he hears your request to go slower.
Be well,
xx
SuzA