Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
In my last post, I talked about my reluctance to let feelings be important in my life. I know they should have some importance but after years of suppressing, ignoring and generally having them move through me quickly so I don't actually feel them; I tend to hold on to my old patterns of not really being present with them.
My therapist is aware of this because I told her flat out what happened to me when I was in my 20s with not so good therapy.
I decided to google feelings in the attempt to learn how to feel them and found 2 lists. One was a list of feelings both positive and negative, and the other list was on needs which I found interesting. I figure that a large part of my problem was that I was not getting many of these needs met.
http://www.cnvc.org/Training/needs-inventory
My sexual abuse was able to occur because as a child I was looking for a way to get these needs met because my mother and step father were not very loving and quite frankly I was afraid of them and tired of being ridiculed.
Of course the sexual abuse brought on many other problems especially since I did not consider it abuse, I held myself accountable for my involvement. I still had all the horrible effects listed in the book, "The Courage to Heal" mainly a lot of self esteem issues, feelings and intimacy.
Now I am rebuilding my self-esteem and I am using this list of needs as a way of figuring out what I need to focus on and how I can provide this for myself. I am very interested in recovering from the ill effects of all the abuse from my childhood as best I can.
My therapist is aware of this because I told her flat out what happened to me when I was in my 20s with not so good therapy.
I decided to google feelings in the attempt to learn how to feel them and found 2 lists. One was a list of feelings both positive and negative, and the other list was on needs which I found interesting. I figure that a large part of my problem was that I was not getting many of these needs met.
http://www.cnvc.org/Training/needs-inventory
My sexual abuse was able to occur because as a child I was looking for a way to get these needs met because my mother and step father were not very loving and quite frankly I was afraid of them and tired of being ridiculed.
Of course the sexual abuse brought on many other problems especially since I did not consider it abuse, I held myself accountable for my involvement. I still had all the horrible effects listed in the book, "The Courage to Heal" mainly a lot of self esteem issues, feelings and intimacy.
Now I am rebuilding my self-esteem and I am using this list of needs as a way of figuring out what I need to focus on and how I can provide this for myself. I am very interested in recovering from the ill effects of all the abuse from my childhood as best I can.
I think it is wonderful that you are on your path to healing and trying to learn all that you can about how you feel now, how you felt then and what you can do to move forward to a future where you feel happy, satisfied and fulfilled in every aspect of it. It's a wonderful thing to see everyone heal.
Take care
In the list "Feelings when your needs are satisfied"....I have felt very few of them (when remembering my childhood. I have felt many more since then)