I was recently admitted into a mental hospital when my plans for suicide were discovered. While in there, the word "dissociation" was used a lot to discribe me. I started to think about it, and relized that it was very true. I internalize everything, and i really dont speak to anyone unless i need to. It is very difficult to try to even try and write something here that is personal and "real". It is as if there is an editor in my brain telling me that everything that i am thinking isnt good enough or that its worded wrong, so instead of speaking to a person, i just hold an imaginary conversation with my self. I relize that i need help. ive been making the effort to talk to my wife more. She really seems to like that. I know a lot of people, but i dont really have any friends... you know someone who i can just call for no reason or just to hang out. So I am going to try to work on that. (that is going to be real hard for me). But the real reason for this post is to ask for help. To be honest my fingers are shaking at the prospect of what i ama abhout to ask. If anyone here would care to send me a message or coment on this post, i would like to learn how to relate to people again. Thank you.