How old are you? Try talking to a school guidance counselor. Are you scared because you think about doing these things? Here for you.

I know how you feel, both my father and stepfather abused me when i was younger. to add to that both my mother and my sister have ended up cheating on their husbands and having messy divorces that greatly effected their children. Things will be tough for a while, but do find someone to talk to, even if it is just a friend or someone on this sight, any thing is better than nothing. Try to talk to a school counselor and try talking to your mom about it, maybe shell understand. Of course i dont know much about your situation, but im always willing to talk if youd like someone to listen to you.

you are not going to do anything like that! i understand the fear. what you went through was so confusing and you blame yourself and feel that you are the bad guy. but you aren't the bad guy! tell yourself that everyday. you are a good person and you deserve to be happy. find someone to talk to, i really hope you can. have you told your mom what happened? just keep asking her for a couselor till she gets you one or research other options like sexual abuse hotlines or like someone else said a school counselor- tell people you can trust, professionals and people on this website- because you know those people will understand- you'll get through this and you're not alone in these feelings- look up websites on buiding self esteem and loving yourself and healing from traumatic events- most of all, tell yourself you are okay. say "i am not the bad guy"- feel angry, you have a right to! something awful was done to you- and that's why you are in pain and confusion now- so, take your power back- also, it isn't strange that after a while you would feel pleasure from what was happening- you were trying to adapt to the situation in a way you could deal with- that happens with abuse- we get used to it and after a while, it seems normal- it's all we know- and we even like it more than if we changed and let ourselves be happy and healthy- watch the movie "what the bleep do we know"- it'll explain that further- there's nothing wrong with you. you're just trying to heal. so keep reaching out and be good to yourself. you'll be fine!

I promise you won't do it. I have the same fear, but I realized if I was going to be an abuser I would be one already. The fact you are worried so much about it shows you won't do it. People inflict the same abuse on others when they are in denial about it, not when they are superparanoid about it. or when they are dissociated or sociopaths. I hope you can get a good therapist with or without your mom's help. I wish I could be there and help you. One thing that helps me is praying to God, let me hear you and then he talks to me in different ways, but he makes it pretty clear that I am not a bad person and he really loves me and I don't have to be so afraid of myself.

I was sexually abuse by my father and the reaction you are having is call "Mirroring" This is the 1st stage in recovery. You mirror what the abuser did to you. Some people become abusers and others don't. You are not going to because an abuser and imitate your abuser because you are conscious of the pain.

You need to move to the next stage "shame and guilt" in this stage you feel that you are the one to blame for the abuse and you feel shame and guilt for attracting the abuser. The next stage is "anger" you are angry at the abuser for what he did to you.

The last stage is "The abuser has shame and guilt" You clearly see your self as an innocent child and the abuser is the one with the "guilt and shame" you did not want the abuse but the abuser did.

These are only stages and as you work on the abuse you will move out of them and recover.

I am at the last stage and is the best one to be. It took me 14 years to get there but I made it and I can enjoy sex without pain.

If you find a good therapist you can move fast. I had to do it in my own.

i think that sometimes. it's never happen. i thank God for that.

I too think you should be totally fine. Specially since you are consciously aware of this fear. It's like the men who grow up without fathers and never want to do that to their children - and don't!

it is called acting out and crying for help.