Sexless Marriage Community Group
This group is for those people who find themselves married to a partner who has little or no interest in having a sexual relationship. This can be very painful for the other partner and leave them feeling rejected, unloved and unwanted. This is a group to provide support for this very painful and very private issue.
Just wanted to share this, as I was very excited about it!
My therapist advised me to use the "not today" mindset typically used in addiction recovery for lack of sex.
She said any time I have an urge, I should just tell myself "not today," rather than confronting my partner, fighting with him, and having the whole ordeal end in both of us being upset.
If I tell myself "not today," I have the freedom to either "get the job done myself" and go on my merry way, or simply forget about the urge/desire for the time being (since this is just for today). This (in my opinion) is much better than thinking "it's going to be like this until July or August, if he ever touches me again" or stressing over how long it has been since we last did anything.
This eliminates: confrontation, stress, feeling defeated, and feelings of being rejected, abandoned, unloved/unlovable while creating a more peaceful relationship and POTENTIALLY giving my partner the freedom to feel comfortable wanting me in the future.
I am going to try that also!!
As for “not today “....that particular phrase makes me laugh and will help me to focus on humor. It’s something my wife and I say in joking. Short version....there’s a video online of an extremely animated woman who says Not Today. Google it - “not today poppin“. It’s only about 30 seconds.
Don’t know if anyone on here watched Game of Thrones, but there’s an episode where a city is buried down. Later a viewer posted that video online as an interview with an eyewitness.