Sexless Marriage Community Group
This group is for those people who find themselves married to a partner who has little or no interest in having a sexual relationship. This can be very painful for the other partner and leave them feeling rejected, unloved and unwanted. This is a group to provide support for this very painful and very private issue.
Hi Yall,
Im new to this group and im glad i found this cause i thought i was the only one going thru this and i don't understand why at all. Well to tell yingz little bout me. I got married 6 yrs ago tomorrow to this guy who showed me the world and that im the only one for him + affection , Love, Honor & trust Etc u know all that good stuff so after the fact of saying ours I Dos' and after we got back from the honeymoon thats when everything went down hill the first yr was really bad soo bad it was like a damn nightmare that wasn't over yet and still isn't over yet :( the affection completely stopped kissing makingout flirting touching and all of that so it went from maybe once or 3 times a yr down to nothing in 1yr which turned into 2 turned into 3yrs which is were im at now. He controls everything from kissing and even when i try to turn him on he just pushes me away and in the end i get hurt with rejection and ive been telling him how im feeling and everything not trying to be like nagging or anything. When i talk to him he tells me that he sees where im coming from and understands but apologizing but no action behind his words but yet keeps on doing what he says he will not do. I even come out and ask him y he doesn't want to have sex w me but all he ever says is I DON"T KNOW but yet i have a damn feeling that he does and his holding back something. Its soo worse yall that we don't holdhands touch etc. He never even tells me im beatiful or sexy i always have to say something so that he can say something back to me. And that hurts when before when we were dating he would just say it out of the blue and now he doesn't i even dropped 70lbs! but that doesn't change things. And he tells me that we are going to have sex this weekend for example but yet it comes it goes then i ask again and hes like this week well it comes and goes and thats pretty much what happens. The crazy part is hes always falling asleep on the couch and hardly ever comes and sleeps in the bed with me. Hes always ingoring me when hes at home hes either -
1. watching tv
2. on his phone - social media = btw he ingores me on fb instagram etc doesn't like anything i post or coments on anything of mine.
3. tells me hes resting his eyes or taking a power nap which is more like a nap 30-2hrs for him!
It just feels like hes drifting away from me like hes not attracted to me. Hes always going over to his momma's house and hes a momma's boy to say the least.
He never communicates w me thru the week at all but on the weekends when we are both home if hes not ingoring me by doing one of the above things i listed. I don't even know if he really truly loves me he doesn't show it doesn't really say it all. I feel sooo alone unwanted and the worse of all my mother in law hates me doesn't want me over at her house cause i am on a diet and she doesn't have food that i eat like a salad or what not for the holidays but all she really cares about is getting grandkids and that i have a job working and getting paid and paying bills well she aint getting no grandkids from me. Both of us agreed we arnt having kids before we got married. But anyways is there something wrong with me that he doesn't want to do anything with me?? I even asked him if i was too fat or if i was too skinny he keeps telling me that im fine but doesn't do nothing at all!!!!! So if im depressed cause of him and all of this its either that or im pissed off at him and not talking to him at all cause of some stupid things hes had done or has not yet done. Its like im always 2nd in his life. I just don't understand if he doesn't love me no more then why the hell doesn't he tell me!!! U know its crazy cause i don't know how to show him respect but yet when i ask him all he does is say i don't know but i will get back with you on that and that has been years!!! Omgies i just want to cry soo bad. Oh and hes 39yrs old and im 32. Its sad that my love life has to be read thru romance books and all :(
What do yall think about all of this? Do u really think its me or what ive done in the beginning of the marriage i did somewhat embarrass him somethat. What do yall think he might be holding back on not telling me???? Im soo depressed frustrated stressed out etc :(
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Hi. This is my first post. I'm here because my husband is an addict and it's having a negative impact on our marriage and my emotional and mental well being. He's an alcoholic who is also addicted to pornography and video gaming. He spends every moment that he isn't at work or sleeping drinking beer, playing his video games, and looking at porn. He's completely pushed me out of his life. We don't...
Hang in there.
You will find a lot of support and wisdom here.
There are a ton of reasons.... maybe a health problem or physical limitation, maybe they suffered abuse or a severe trauma that causes them to shut down to avoid that happening again... maybe it is as simple as low testosterone or a premenopausal woman having issues because of hormones. Unfortunately, whatever does cause them to pull away.....we are the ones left feeling hurt, unattractive, unlovable, embarrassed and ashamed.
When I did actually bring the issue up, I would be made to feel like i was a perverted sex fiend when in reality, I was simply human who wanted (needed) desperately to be touched, wanted again. I am married 15 years (the last 10 plus with no affection, communication, or help of any kind.) I am currently beginning a divorce.
Please know you are not alone. there are so many of us going through this. I have learned so much from reaching out and sharing with others. There are those in their 20s to those in their 70s going through this.... women and men... and basically it does affect