Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
Define Criticism: The tendancy to expressed disapproval by pointing out faults or shortcomings.
So, I think when I ask for feedback or criticism, then I am at a place emotionally and relationally to respond rather than react to criticism. But when it is consistantly offered as a defense mechanism it triggers me and is not very safe.
My question is what would be some functial, not avoidant ways to respond to this criticism. At this point, my only capability is to create distance. But that is not very relational though it is safe.
From an SOs perspective, what would honor your anger and pain while protecting myself from a flood of criticisms resonating from that pain.
I very much know I am a sex addict, It is not productive for that to be pointed out when I express a need, or feeling.
Thoughts?
So, I think when I ask for feedback or criticism, then I am at a place emotionally and relationally to respond rather than react to criticism. But when it is consistantly offered as a defense mechanism it triggers me and is not very safe.
My question is what would be some functial, not avoidant ways to respond to this criticism. At this point, my only capability is to create distance. But that is not very relational though it is safe.
From an SOs perspective, what would honor your anger and pain while protecting myself from a flood of criticisms resonating from that pain.
I very much know I am a sex addict, It is not productive for that to be pointed out when I express a need, or feeling.
Thoughts?
I hope I am not overstepping my boundaries...
I read your response to "nonjudgement reply#5", and your last response to this.
Do you allow you wife to see the vulnerable side that you express so readily on this DS site?
Your words are like poetry.
I would write or email her more, but every once in a while she asks me for help with her email account. A collection of unread emails from me sit at the top of her account. She skips my emails as she reads everything else. I think the vulnerability not the intensity is what really frightens her.
I still keep gong back to the previous post where you express your love and how beautiful she is in your eyes, for EVERYTHING that makes her the woman you love.
I have begged my husband to write me a love letter. He did so long ago when we were young.
Have you ever read The Power of a Praying Husband, by Stormie Omartian? It also has a partner book, The Power of a Praying Wife.
That which was intended for evil will be turned to good by those who love God....you know this.
Peace to you.
I hear you encouraging me to affirm her. I need to work on this. I will think on this and reply later.
SheenRe, would you mind bowing out for a few posts on this thread?
It is amazing how you can go from moments of clarity to perids of total fog. This is not the first time you have distorted someone's comments or view in oerder to take a 1up position. ironically, you do it by being short sided.
Like Choose said, would you please use some contianment boundaries and let this important topic flow without diversion?Perhaps you can post your question on the spouses board?