Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group

Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.

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tiki73 02/15/2017

Hello, my name is Matt and I am a recovering sex addict. Today is 2-15-17 and it's been a while since I last checked in.

I am still going to therapy and still continue to attend groups.

I would have to say that I have been completely honest since my last check in. There have been many, many opportunities to lie to my wife. I am actually liking that I am telling her the truth. It's so much easier to keep stories straight and stress has gone down greatly and I feel so much better.

I know that I don't have a pot to piss in when it comes to my wife not believing me. And that is my fault and my weight to bear. I can say that it still hurts that she doesn't believe me when I am telling her the truth. I will continue to fight and will keep trying to prove to my wife that I am telling the truth. About all things and at all times.

I even tried to go and get a polygraph test administered today. It didn't go as well as I had hoped. I am sitting here waiting for the results from the examiner. The tests were showing that I was trying to control my breathing too much. The examiner said that he couldn't get clear results and sent me on my way. Said he would try and decifer something from the results that I have him and then call me. So I am currently waiting for him to call me.

I wanted clear results so that I could give them to my wife and prove to her that I am not lying. And now it doesn't look like I will be able to do that - as I would have to go back again and redo everything. I wasn't nervous about the test as I know deep down that I am not lying about the questions that my wife needs answers too. Once you get strapped in that chair - my nerves kicked into high gear. I was told that I was trying to do countermeasures - which I don't even know what that is.

So - yeah. I am super nervous now waiting to hear back. I called and told my wife all this and I am not sure what she is thinking. And that makes me nervous too. Thankfully we have a couples counseling session tonight - maybe we can talk about it there. Thinking about all this is starting to get me all emotional. Because I really do love my wife. I really do love my kids. And I want more than anything to be back with them. Now I am unsure of when or if that's going to happen. And that scares me.

candycin 02/16/2017

I am so sorry that you had a bad experience with the poly...was that your first test? My husband has done 2 right after full disclosure. The first one was done by an ex cop that had been doing polys with criminals. He only asked 3 questions all worded differently, and my husband failed and was also told that he was trying to use counter measures. (he was in the army and the guy said he was probably taught how to do counter measures which wasnt true at all) the question was worded in a way that no recovering sex addict could ever pass. When we were told the results, i nearly lost my mind. I couldnt believe that after disclosure he was still lying to me. A couple weeks later he flew to a well respected treatment facility that only works with sex addicts, and they have a polygraph as well. I worked with the very professional tester to come up with 6 very specific questions. He passed all of them. When i discussed with him what had happened with the first one he assured me that no one would pass that type of question. Polys are a great tool for a sex addict to prove to themselves as well as their spouses that they are living a clean, sober life but most importantly not lying.

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