Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
I've read up on this challenge on YBOP and it was pretty informative in fact I have taken a lot of knowledge from that site. I can't say it's eased the pain but it's definitely educated me on what I may be up against.
I read that a lot of people who have taken it have kind of changed it up a bit... I want to know what has worked best for the people who have taken the challenge or from the spouses??? Also, I am under the impression it's no sex, no masturbation, no porn- but what if I were to induce? To go along with those two questions, I don't want it for only 90 days, I want if for my entire marriage life, is that not realistic with this challenge?
I started this incredibly, heart wrenching journey with the notion of wanting to work on my marriage and not neglect my marriage. I was aware that my marriage was suffering from porn addiction or compulsion or just fixation- habitual use and I was determined to get my marriage straight. Then I felt alone from my husband and like everything I was feeling was minimized and no big deal, I started to work on myself and my self care... which I feel what was needed as well; but I strayed from my earlier determination. Or at least that's what I believe happened because now I feel like after "focusing" on myself more or solely I have pulled away. And I am scared that I may have sealed our fate more than I imagined I could have.
I read that a lot of people who have taken it have kind of changed it up a bit... I want to know what has worked best for the people who have taken the challenge or from the spouses??? Also, I am under the impression it's no sex, no masturbation, no porn- but what if I were to induce? To go along with those two questions, I don't want it for only 90 days, I want if for my entire marriage life, is that not realistic with this challenge?
I started this incredibly, heart wrenching journey with the notion of wanting to work on my marriage and not neglect my marriage. I was aware that my marriage was suffering from porn addiction or compulsion or just fixation- habitual use and I was determined to get my marriage straight. Then I felt alone from my husband and like everything I was feeling was minimized and no big deal, I started to work on myself and my self care... which I feel what was needed as well; but I strayed from my earlier determination. Or at least that's what I believe happened because now I feel like after "focusing" on myself more or solely I have pulled away. And I am scared that I may have sealed our fate more than I imagined I could have.
Such an important point is being made here. Yes, you can relapse even after three or four months. It really takes up to a full year or longer for the brain chemistry to return to normal.
Once it does compassion and empathy are more realistic and replacing a nasty addiction with healthier coping skills is so much more reachable a goal.
Good for you!!
I know many recovering addicts that have a problem with intimacy in their relationship. I feel blessed that we have not had a problem with it since the reboot (or before for that matter). I know the importance of leaving my addiction behind me for my recovery and I realize how much pain I have caused in my relationship. It makes me sad that I cannot change the past but I am so thankful that my girlfriend has stuck by me, even through some very difficult times.
I know that if we can continue the healing process, we will come out stronger than ever. I have hopes for a future together, a future that excludes sex addiction and the character flaws that are inherent with it.