Senior Health & Aging Support Group
Aging is an important part of all human societies reflecting the biological changes that occur, but also reflecting cultural and societal conventions. There is often considerable social pressure in many societies to sustain denial of the aging process. Join this community to discuss general issues with aging and senior health.
I'm 65 years old and have been living in a personal care home for the past 3 years, after my husband died in 2017. I came here because my social worker at the time thought it was a good idea. It didn't take me long to realize that I don't feel like I belong here. I miss independent living. I had my own apartment for ten years. When I left, I lost all my furniture, my possessions, and my car. I didn't realize at first how much of my freedom, my independence I was giving up. In particular, I've gotten in trouble lately because I dared to keep over the counter vitamins, supplements and medicines in my room. That is a big no-no. Anything like that must be approved in writing by my family doctor. This infuriates me, since there are some OTC meds, like Pepcid, that I like to keep on hand and under my own control. Also there are some herbal supplements, like valerian, that help me sleep and I want to be free to take them. So I had my family doctor write letters of permission to the administrator for me to take Pepcid and valerian. That was a week ago. The administrator says he doesn't know if they are written the way they are supposed to for this purpose. RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He says they should be written more like a prescription, but he's not sure. I am so tired of this BS. Buying these things is something I pretty much took for granted. I do my research before taking anything, and some of what I want I've been taking for years. Times like this I really miss living on my own. Plus I don't like the food--I'm a semi-vegetarian and they serve meat twice a day. No fresh vegetables or fruit or whole grains. Everything is out of a can. Once again I'm thinking about moving out, but where? I can't afford a supportive community on my Social Security. I can afford a low income apartment but I'd somehow have to get furniture. I have no family or friends. This is not my hometown. I don't know the area and I have no transportation anymore. The taxi service went out of business due to COVID. I am very frustrated.
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And its already been noted by the weather service as heat advisory today thru Wed here.I have a rack of St. Louis Cut Pork Ribs. I will use a charcoal snake method of two rows on bottom shingled around about 3/4 of way on outside of the grill. Then on top of those I will shingle a single layer of briquetted same around 3/4 of grill. Adding some chunks of wood every 3-4 inches around the grill.I...
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Hope the dog days of summer aren't getting you down!
Having an ally and confidant will help you cope with the system. Enlist your doctor with help in the diet department. He could "prescribe" some dietary changes, something like the OTC meds, that the residence management would be obliged to help you with. Can you get a refrigerator in your room? Small ones can be found new or used to fit a small budget, and can be used to keep snacks and even replacement meals. Since online food ordering and delivery is a thing now, you won't even need a car to get some wishes granted.
Independent living should a long-term goal, because unless you get a big financial windfall, it is something that you will need friends "on the outside" to help with. In the meantime, participate in some activities that will keep your mind and body fit, perhaps yoga or power-walking. Good luck, and stay in touch!
Look into possibility of using Uber and/or Lyft for occasional transportation. The automobile industry is changing at the speed of light. Gas guzzlers are becoming liabilities. Owning one is like having a pet dinosaur that isn't house-trained. In my town we have a group call RSVP that organizes volunteers who do things like provide rides and meals to seniors who need some help. Maybe your town has something similar.
Living alone at home, even with carers visiting three times a day, is a harsh life. I guess it all depends on how much care you need. I am paralysed from the chest down. If you can get about, maybe it wouldn't be as bad for you. The idea of enlisting outside help from someone familiar with you condition and alternatives available in your area sounds a good one.
Best wishes, Barry.