Self-Injury Support Group

Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.

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nemesis6 02/06/2013

Three months ago the company I work for went bust. Iv been looking for work everyday since then. And now it's been so long and iv had so many disappointments with interviews that serious hopelessness is starting to set in.
Waiting for recruiters to email me back when they say they will is killing me!
It doesn't help that my family have a policy for everyone which is that you have to EARN your place in the family. And it doesn't help that I was adopted and not born into it either... I feel alone and very unloved.

I haven't self harmed in about a year, but just today I felt myself falling to pieces again inside. And so I went up to my room and took out the blade I used to use and stared at it and touched it. At that moment I'm ashamed to say that it felt like an old friend that was always there for me when my world came crashing down, and I had not a friend in the world, and no one I could confide in.
It saddens me so much that I felt like that... Still, I decided to give myself this afternoon. And I decided not to cut, and to ask you all for help instead.
Any advice with how to cope with these terribly painful and overwhelming feelings and a few kind words would really help me right now xxx

theblackrose 02/06/2013

You are not alone. I care. I really do. *Hugs* Im so sorry your going through so much right now. I wish you all the best!

deleted_user 02/06/2013

Hello nemesis. I am so sorry you lost your job and that earning money equals love in your family. It sounds like you have tried so desperately to be successful in your families eyes but you feel they never quite accepted you so you have to try even harder to earn their love and approval but love shouldn't be that way. I think that they should love you no matter what your working/money situation is. Have you ever told them how much it hurts you that they are this way? Or would your family just freak out if you opened up to them? I have no doubt in my mind that you will find a new job. I know the waiting game sucks and it feels like an eternity but it will happen for you. Things just take time darling. You should celebrate the fact that you didn't cut when you had that blade in your hand. That took a lot of courage and self restraint. I am here if you ever need to talk. Hang in there.

e4now 02/06/2013

your courage is real great for not giving in to cutting, i know how hard it is not to...i agree, you will gfind another job, you ill be successful...if only time healed...hopefully things will start to look up for you

nemesis6 02/06/2013

I'm trying to stay strong and not cut, but its difficult... I find myself sleeping a lot to numb the pain. Does anyone else do that?

deleted_user 02/06/2013

I know what it's like to feel like you'll never earn the respect or love in your family and that's hard. which is why i moved away to go to college and learn to stop harming myself.

the best advice i can give you is to distract yourself from the urges, sometimes distracting yourself with something productive can make you feel twice as good because you got something accomplished and you didn't give in and cut.

and yes when i was first fighting the urges and even now when they get really strong (im 67 days clean) i found myself sleeping more so i didn't give in and didn't have to think about it.

i hope this helps and i'm always here to listen or talk if you feel like you need a friend who understands.

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