Self-Injury Support Group
Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.
So, I just got out of the hospital. I felt like I was going to relapse, so I decided to go in again. I haven't been in the hospital for a year now, so I thought I was doing pretty well. I was proud of myself for coping, but then all of a sudden I felt like everything was spiraling out of control.
I wanted to hurt myself. I wanted to so badly, but I didn't. At least not right away.
I relapsed. I cut myself and of all places I did it in the hospital.
What happened was a nurse yelled at me. She yelled at me so loud she woke patients up. Why? Well, it all started when I saw her yelling at another patient. It upset me. Turned out all he wanted was a blanket and she was busy. He kept pestering her. He wasn't completely there mentally. So it upset me all the more she yelled at him. He kept saying he was cold, so I stepped in and gave him the blanket off my bed. The nurse saw. She started SCREAMING at me. She yelled at me for butting into the conversation and giving him a blanket. I don't handle being yelled at well. It reminds me of my abuse I suffered when I was younger. When people raise their voices it makes me want to "punish" myself.
So I went to my room and took a pen cap and broke it off. I sat there for about an hour digging into the same spot. It took a lot of effort, but I did it. I relapsed and hurt myself all because I was yelled at.
Do I regret stepping in? No. But I think that lady shouldn't be a nurse if she is going to raise her voice to patients. That should be a big no-no in a psychiatric unit. You never know what people are going through.
But I left that hospital feeling worse than when I went in.. Now I am still upset and struggling with my depression. They didn't do anything for me. But I am in a partial hospital now. I go every weekday. I'm hoping this helps.
I wanted to hurt myself. I wanted to so badly, but I didn't. At least not right away.
I relapsed. I cut myself and of all places I did it in the hospital.
What happened was a nurse yelled at me. She yelled at me so loud she woke patients up. Why? Well, it all started when I saw her yelling at another patient. It upset me. Turned out all he wanted was a blanket and she was busy. He kept pestering her. He wasn't completely there mentally. So it upset me all the more she yelled at him. He kept saying he was cold, so I stepped in and gave him the blanket off my bed. The nurse saw. She started SCREAMING at me. She yelled at me for butting into the conversation and giving him a blanket. I don't handle being yelled at well. It reminds me of my abuse I suffered when I was younger. When people raise their voices it makes me want to "punish" myself.
So I went to my room and took a pen cap and broke it off. I sat there for about an hour digging into the same spot. It took a lot of effort, but I did it. I relapsed and hurt myself all because I was yelled at.
Do I regret stepping in? No. But I think that lady shouldn't be a nurse if she is going to raise her voice to patients. That should be a big no-no in a psychiatric unit. You never know what people are going through.
But I left that hospital feeling worse than when I went in.. Now I am still upset and struggling with my depression. They didn't do anything for me. But I am in a partial hospital now. I go every weekday. I'm hoping this helps.
But first of all, I am proud of you for helping that patient. I'd have wanted a son of mine (if I had any) to do the same.
More when I'm not at work.