Self-Injury Support Group
Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.
Cutting and pills have always been my way of SI, but lately I've been thinking of so many more things. But not only am i thinking of ways to hurt myself, I'm thinking of ways to die. Recently my mother and I went with my sister to a house she was looking at renting, the back yard was pretty much just a huge cliff, I've always been afraid of heights and never gone near them because when I do, I feel like jumping. Like something is literally pushing me closer to the edge. Anyway, I don't know what I was thinking, but I did go to the edge. I kept thinking "just take another step". I don't know if I wanted to die, or if I just wanted to fall, or what the hell it was about. After we left I started thinking, maybe I'm not afraid of heights, and it's just myself who I'm afraid of. Maybe I just don't trust myself near heights. Because the thought of falling doesn't scare me at all.... But it's just getting to the point where sometimes I don't feel like I know myself, and sometimes I don't even feel like I'm in control of myself. I get soo angry, or sad, and I can't stop it. I haven't felt happy in a while. All I do anymore is lay in bed.. I don't have money, so I can't go to a therapist or anything.. Any advice on what to do?
Consider asking yourself questions just to find what the problem may be. Do you find that those thoughts of ending your life come mostly as you are scared, lonely, or angry ( or with any negative emotions)? Then as you are feeling and thinking this way, take the time to find a sweet, fresh, quiet place that makes you feel comfortable and safe and think things out clearly. Concentrate on what was going on which caused you to have desperate thoughts or pressing emotional anguish. Write your thoughts out slowly, or record your voice, softly. Read slowly and listen to what you've recorded that tells of how you were feeling. Answer yourself with comments of better choices and what appears fair to you and your need for happiness. Try to do this daily until the good, positive thoughts simply happen on their own, and this time without the effort of writing or recording them. What you are attempting to do is to change your way of thinking and dealing with stressful issues before they attack and begin to control you. Start today to shake off harmful thoughts and find your rest. I have complete faith in you that you can and you will.