Here's some questions you may want to ask yourself that might help you find the answer to your question:

1.) What are you feeling [emotions] when you get the urge to SI and/or when you SI?

2.)What thoughts are going through your head when you get the urge to SI and/ or when you SI?

3.) Have you gone through a stressful experience that has triggered the SI?

4.) Is there a certain time of day that you get the urge and/or when you SI?

Hope this helps.

SI is an addiction. Once you start and it keeps making you feel good you want to go back to that high. It is just like taking a drug or drinking. So what once made you start may or may not be what is making you continue. You maybe looking for an excuse to you can justify it but will that excuse really hold up? It is a difficult road to be on but it is one that when you are ready to try to stop people will be there for you.

Thank you Joneszy93 and guycountry. You have given me much to ponder. Support is so important to me. I am on the sight everyday. Hopefully soon I will be one who can suggest and support others as you are.

@ guy country - so true! When I (recently) all the ahapes from my room, I remember texting my friend (the only one that I'm opened wih my SI with, because she's gone brought it too) and I remember telling her "I feel like a smoker who's trying to quit smoking" and she basically said what you just said, that's an addiction. You get a high from it. The high comes from endorphins that the body releases when it gets cut.

@ Mary - you're so welcome. That's what this site is for, support :) we're all here to support each other :) And like Mary said, it's s tough road, but you're not on this journey alone. We've (everyone on this board) either are or have been where you are. And remember, relapse is inevitable, slip ups happen. It's hard to quit something like cold turkey. Two years I thought I was "cured" and now I'm on day 23 of being clean. The thing is, is to try to find good (positive) coping skills to replace the cutting (or drinking or drugs, etc). The more you start to use those skills to release the emotions that you're feeling, the less you'll get the urge to cut. And like guy country said, you have to be ready. But until then and then when you are ready, we'll be rooting you on the whole way! :)

Jonezy93 is right. This is what this sight is for. It is about the only thing that has really helped me with this addiction. Have I relapsed? Yes I am on my 4th month of not doing anything to myself and that was after I think a 2 year free. So like Jonezy93 said it will happen. It's like smoking except there really isn't medicine out there to help you quit. This is why we come here this is our medicine and one day we may be able to say I have been SI free for 5 years.

Exactly! ^^