I am 20 years old and ive been cutting since i was 12... in a messed up way i started because i wanted to know why the closest person to me did it. my aunt, she was very gloomy and so was i. we were the type of people that got labeled emo or goth. we are 5 years apart so she is like an older sibling to me. being the youngest of course i copied her with petty things like toys and music etc. etc... but when i started i felt so alone and it crossed my mind that she did it. it made me wonder why she did it. so that day when i came home yet again from bullies tormenting me to a single mother screaming at me for not folding a towel the right way and how im worthless little shit. i snapped... at first it scared me to even pick up the razor-blade but it felt so light in my hands i slid it across my arm and i felt a little bit of the weight the world laid on my shoulders dissipate. with each cut i felt in a weird way stronger. the cuts were as big as a scratch from my cat so noone put two and two together untill i was about 14. i was labeled as that girl who cuts herself. all because no one told me, though it should of been obvious to do it in a place where it can be covered... now a new year has come and ive cut myself 10 times since it started... and ive realized they are getting deeper... but i dont know any other way to cope with the anger and sadness i hold in me. even tonight i wanted to come home and cut all because someone i hold dear to me made me feel like shit for not understanding something. i dont dare tell him though because hes already threatened to lock me up in a institute... and yeah im crazy i suppose but its not like i asked to be diagnosed with depression or bipolar... i just need to stop so i dont panic my friends and family anymore also its hard to find someone or a job when it looks like freddy kruger or wolverine grabbed you by your arm...