Schizophrenia Support Group
Schizophrenia is a psychiatric diagnosis that describes a mental disorder characterized by impairments in the perception of reality and by significant social dysfunction. Untreated schizophrenia is typically characterized by demonstrating disorganized thinking and experiencing delusions or auditory hallucinations.
So my lithium has definitely helped with the severe depression and mania roller coaster ride i was on for years but sometimes I still feel a smaller degree of mania. Every in a while I am so hyper I can't sleep even though my meds can sometimes put me into such a deep sleep I sleep through the day however they are the only ones working. I think I'm still feeling some effects because 1. No med can be perfect and get rid of everything and 2. I'm don't have a psychologist. I just moved back with my parents and need to find one. Now that you know a little background here is my problem:
I have a boyfriend of almost 7 years and he is nice, and takes good care of me but I can't bring myself to be intimate with him. We have been very intimate in the past but my mania on countless occasions my freshmen year of college I cheated on him until I temporarily broke it off. I was very psychotically unstable and not on meds yet or in therapy. When we got back together we had sex but I got very sick the next year and I thought I had lost my sex drive. Then I went manic again and slept with someone else. On meds I really thought my sex drive was gone and the doctor said I might experience my sex drive diminished. I thought it was gone well when I was in the airport in San Juan, PR flying home I met a guy and started harmlessly flirting (which I also don't do with my bf) that harmless flirting turned into me giving him my number and he would call me until he found out I had a boyfriend. I want to see him again next time I go (I go often) but he might have the "you're off limits" flags put up already and I guess I technically am but I want him so bad it hurts. When he texts me back I get excited and it's like my sex drive is back.... just not with my bf. The voices in my head that hate my bf so much want me to act on this before the other guy is gone forever. I'm not sure if I love my bf anymore and he hasn't even done anything wrong! WTF am i supposed to do on this one?!!!!?!!? Any advice would be appreciated. Sorry that this is very long and sorry if this just makes you think I'm a psychotic slut.
I have a boyfriend of almost 7 years and he is nice, and takes good care of me but I can't bring myself to be intimate with him. We have been very intimate in the past but my mania on countless occasions my freshmen year of college I cheated on him until I temporarily broke it off. I was very psychotically unstable and not on meds yet or in therapy. When we got back together we had sex but I got very sick the next year and I thought I had lost my sex drive. Then I went manic again and slept with someone else. On meds I really thought my sex drive was gone and the doctor said I might experience my sex drive diminished. I thought it was gone well when I was in the airport in San Juan, PR flying home I met a guy and started harmlessly flirting (which I also don't do with my bf) that harmless flirting turned into me giving him my number and he would call me until he found out I had a boyfriend. I want to see him again next time I go (I go often) but he might have the "you're off limits" flags put up already and I guess I technically am but I want him so bad it hurts. When he texts me back I get excited and it's like my sex drive is back.... just not with my bf. The voices in my head that hate my bf so much want me to act on this before the other guy is gone forever. I'm not sure if I love my bf anymore and he hasn't even done anything wrong! WTF am i supposed to do on this one?!!!!?!!? Any advice would be appreciated. Sorry that this is very long and sorry if this just makes you think I'm a psychotic slut.
I won't pass judgment, as I'm not in a position to do so. However, most guys (I'm one myself, so I should know) will have a mindset in place that states "You can't be HIS and still be MINE" (and yes, that line appears in a Kiss song, for you purveyors of song trivia and other useless information). On that note, it seems that you have the capacity to be intimate, but not with the boyfriend. If this is permanent, then you'll have to set him free.
Understand that you'll subject him to some degree of heartache, brittanycubs, as this is to be expected after any such parting. Of course, you may have to constrain yourself from weeping and jealousy upon hearing that he's attained the level of intimacy with someone else that he wasn't able to obtain from you (in street vernacular, you can't get butt-hurt ).
Then, if permanent break-up is the path you choose, pursue the other guy. But don't string both guys along...sooner or later, one or both of them is gonna get wise to the OTHER GUY, and that never ends pretty (unless the crooked H is a possibility all three of you actually WANT to entertain).
You must choose. If you choose NOT to choose, then the choice will be made for you eventually, and that could be an UGLY conclusion.
Or, to reverse the situation, would you tolerate such behavior from him? Ponder that, and act accordingly...if all else fails, reflect on the Golden Rule. And I hope I don't come off as TOO preachy, so I won't spend too much more time upon my soapbox. Peace, and good luck.