Rheumatoid Arthritis Support Group
Rheumatoid arthritis is a chronic, inflammatory, multisystem, autoimmune disorder. It is a disabling and painful condition which can lead to substantial loss of mobility due to pain and joint destruction. The disease is also systemic in that it often also affects many extra-articular tissues throughout the body including the skin, blood vessels, heart, lungs, and...
Hi all,
Thank you all for being here because I don't know what else I'd do without your advice and help... My SO has RA, I don't, and I'm struggling with my role in our relationship. I don't know how to help them or support them. They're on Orencia right now, but they've had tons of migraines since going off of their steroid and more joint pain since starting Orencia than they did before. Part of that is they are on the shot form and hate shots, so they just aren't taking their shots. I don't know how to help them with that, what my boundaries should be, how to support them or understand what they're going through...
I posted about this before when my SO and I started dating. Now I just feel more confused than ever in dealing with them and their disease. I just don't know what to do for them. They don't talk about it much, but I see how it impacts them, makes them tired, and makes them hurt. I don't know how to help them.
Well and now we're in winter, and I have severe seasonal allergies which leave me susceptible to sinus infections and bronchitis. I have been on antibiotics for the last infection since Monday; I went to the doctor as soon as I could. Will I be okay to spend time with my SO now? How long should I wait to be around them when I'm sick?
Sadly, because I didn't become symptomatic until Sunday and the person who infected me didn't become symptomatic until Saturday, I spent Friday night (when I was a carrier incubating my illness) having fun with my SO, and we kissed. Now they've been super-tired for the last week with migraines and extra joint pain on top of the pain they were already having. I'm scared I made them sick.
But, if I don't know that I'm sick, how on earth can I protect them from my illnesses??? I'm terrified I'm going to kill them!!!
Thank you all for being here because I don't know what else I'd do without your advice and help... My SO has RA, I don't, and I'm struggling with my role in our relationship. I don't know how to help them or support them. They're on Orencia right now, but they've had tons of migraines since going off of their steroid and more joint pain since starting Orencia than they did before. Part of that is they are on the shot form and hate shots, so they just aren't taking their shots. I don't know how to help them with that, what my boundaries should be, how to support them or understand what they're going through...
I posted about this before when my SO and I started dating. Now I just feel more confused than ever in dealing with them and their disease. I just don't know what to do for them. They don't talk about it much, but I see how it impacts them, makes them tired, and makes them hurt. I don't know how to help them.
Well and now we're in winter, and I have severe seasonal allergies which leave me susceptible to sinus infections and bronchitis. I have been on antibiotics for the last infection since Monday; I went to the doctor as soon as I could. Will I be okay to spend time with my SO now? How long should I wait to be around them when I'm sick?
Sadly, because I didn't become symptomatic until Sunday and the person who infected me didn't become symptomatic until Saturday, I spent Friday night (when I was a carrier incubating my illness) having fun with my SO, and we kissed. Now they've been super-tired for the last week with migraines and extra joint pain on top of the pain they were already having. I'm scared I made them sick.
But, if I don't know that I'm sick, how on earth can I protect them from my illnesses??? I'm terrified I'm going to kill them!!!
My first 5 biologics were me giving myself a shot. It was never a fun time, but I knew it would make me feel better. It was also easy to just pull it out of the fridge, wait a bit, then stab myself. Now, I am on a drug that is done by infusion - which means a 2 hour drive, sitting in the infusion center for 5-6 hours, then back in the car for a 2 hour drive home. This method is hugely more expensive. But, it makes me feel so much better.
Having joint pain,and being tired is part of the deal with RA, it does not mean you did it to them. Take it easy on yourself!
I do the infusions every 4 weeks as my insurance doesn't pay for the shots. But it is so important to get on a schedule with it so the amount doesn't waiver so much...that will not make it not work but may cause them to develop antibodies to it. Offer to do the shot yourself as the syringe is a sure-click.....you just press down and it works by itself...no pressing of a plunger. Press and wait.
I remember when I had to MTX shots, my DIL who is a nurse, taught me how to do it but refused to do it for me...made me do it. Hard the first time but really easy every since. The biologic shots hurt, however, so it's harder to do it to yourself. I even see patients coming into my doc's office for their shots...they just can't do it so the nurses do it for them. Ask if doing it for them would help or seeing if the doc's office will.
Prednisone helps everyone but can kill you. So we all have to get off of it. So it's not a choice of taking pred for years and years instead of something like Orencia, it's a question of taking Orencia or another shot like Enbrel or Humira. All are shots with the exception of Xeljanz but I've only heard of 1 or 2 people here who found it works...but it is a pill. Another option if the shots are a no go.
So, provide support but not so much that they can't take over themselves at some time.
Hugs........Jen