Rheumatoid Arthritis Support Group

Rheumatoid arthritis is a chronic, inflammatory, multisystem, autoimmune disorder. It is a disabling and painful condition which can lead to substantial loss of mobility due to pain and joint destruction. The disease is also systemic in that it often also affects many extra-articular tissues throughout the body including the skin, blood vessels, heart, lungs, and...

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stephgas 02/04/2014

my hands, fingers, and wrists feel like they are getting worse and worse. yesterday and today are probably the most painful hand-days i've had since this all started. it's not just that typing is painful. using my phone. picking up a mug. washing my hair.

i'm also realizing i've had this headache forever, and i'm not sure what to do with it. i'm going to take a couple of advil before i leave for my internship today.

i'm also having this pain where my liver is. my rheumy said my last blood test didn't show any issues and i should have my latest test results today or tomorrow. she wants me to follow up with my gp and get tests.

and on top of that, some of the symptoms of my mental illness are popping back up. i've gotten myself back into therapy because of it, but i'm wondering if all the medication i'm taking on top of my psychotropic medication is affecting how it works. or maybe al the stress of the rd. ugh.

on days like this, i don't know how i'm going to be a productive member of society ever again. everyone in my family who has rd keeps telling me that it gets better, that i just need to find a medication combo that works for me. i get that, but i just don't know what to do until then.

depotblue 02/04/2014

Steph

on one of your low days i just want to tell you how much I enjoy reading your post, admire your tenacity. I remember emailing you when you were finishing up your finals. you had quite the fall. We are more than the sum total of the direct deposits to our checking accounts and you are doing everything in your power to prepare for a new profession where I think you would be perfect for clients.
our bodies are just these vehicles that keep failing us. you have a sense of humor that keeps the board a lively and nice place to visit.

besides you are a new yorker to boot so you are like a thousand times cooler than myself living in the outposts of stepfordville suburbia and you probably eat more kale than I do.

don't let this day run away from you. get a friend over and have her/him be all your spoons today.

hugs
Ros

deleted_user 02/04/2014

Filling you life with as much support as you can find will do a world of good to help you cope. I have dealt with so many of the same issues you have described, chronic disease and pain breeds depression and the only way to keep it at bay is to find a balance for the bad stuff. In other words you need to have something that emotionally fills you as you expend emotional energy so that you stay in better balance. What that is for you I dont' know, for some simple answers are fresh flowers, uplifting music, a great book, etc. spend some time thinking about that and see what you can put in your life to help you cope and give you some joy in these hard days. As for the disease getting worse, that is the pattern unfortunately, it is a progressive disease and I think the early years are the worst, at least that is my case.

annettearizona 02/04/2014

Since I read a five letter word you wrote "intern" ok so it's a six letter word-that can be stressful-thus pains and headaches..But all of your problems isn't stress caused-there are the physical ones as well,like you said the dr has to get your meds figured out..but in the meantime you may try to keep a low profile-still go out and keep active..but maybe something new to do might help?

bcatz 02/04/2014

There is a lining around your liver that can be affected by RA. It is real and it can diminish as quickly as it's shown up. Even if the tests are all normal, know that your pain is legitimate and it is ok to feel bad.

altoclef 02/04/2014

Sorry you are having such a crap time, Steph. Pain, depression, grey skies, unending snow, probably no sound sleep, and a headache to boot- yuck.

What to do until then? One foot in front of the other, I guess. Personally, i find that blood oranges take the midwinter taste of dust and ashes out of my mouth, but that may just be me.

As far as all the meds go, do you have access to a psychopharmacologist? Not a common speciality, but if you can find, he/she may have answers to you questions.

sammyo1 02/04/2014

You do the best you can.
Whatever it is that gives you peace & or at least content.
It's hard waiting a& wondering.
Headaches do me in. All the pain gets to me but the headaches
I can't function.
Do you know what type or what's causing the headaches?
Hard to treat if you don't know the cause.
I do feel for you & I hope things get better.
Sammy

stephgas 02/04/2014

@ros - i had kale juice last night. so yes, i do eat more kale than you do :P but i live in the 'burbs.

although my headache is still here, i had a productive day interning. i forgot to take lunch, but i remembered to eat. a lot of people mention building a support group. i'm not good at asking for help when i need it. i probably should get back to twelve-stepping and learn how to do crap like that.

@alto, i have had a lot of trouble finding a local psychopharmacologist. my therapist's office has an excellent one on staff - that's not accepting new patients. i'm kind of hoping that once i establish a good relationship with my therapist, he might be able to put in a good word for me :D

mponto 02/04/2014

So sorry to hear of your suffering! I find that the damp weather really makes for more pain and this last week has been a doozy on the east coast, causing me a bad flare. Stress triggers it too and you sound like you have a lot of that! The right medication will work wonders for you as it finally did for me. keep trying different ones till you find what works for you . In the mean time do what my friends here suggested to me that has helped a lot - get an electric blanket that you can wrap yourself in when you are in pain . What a difference it makes, like taking a hot shower that doesn't have to end ! The relief is immediate and so comforting ;a long lasting warm hug ! I hope you can find some peace in your pain. you're not alone and will be in many of our thoughts and prayers{think of that when you are wrapped in your warm blanket}

beechfeet 02/04/2014

Hi Stephgas,

Your posts are some that I look forward to reading the most on the board and you add so much here. That being said I'm sending you love and kudos for doing all that you do and dealing with this illness. The veterans here seem to be right-newby here too-its a very confusing and frustrating time. Luckily they unanimously agree it gets better. I'm hanging in there with you.

deleted_user 02/04/2014

I am sorry you are having a tough time -- especially with your hands. I am thinking of you and sending strenth through this post to you.

Isn't your Disney trip coming up? Let's get your mind off the pain...tell us about your trip plans!!

And I know this sounds random but I struggled with headache issues last year and in the end you know what helped me the most? Oddly, a plastic mouth guard to prevent teeth grinding and help with my TMJ. I am not suggesting this might cure your headaches alone but have you by chance seen a dentist to discuss this possibility. Maybe a simple mouth guard plus headache meds would help ease the pain.

I love your blog. Keep writing. Come back and let all of your friends know how you are doing.

Beech feet and I are on a Pred taper girlfriend -- we need your humor!!

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