bcatz- so sorry you are so anxious and have the "what ifs"
May I suggest going to Youtube and typing in mindful meditation?
I have always been anxious and have of late watch one or two of these videos before bed and then drift off to sleep. If I awake the mantras and breathing techniques kick in automatically.

Don't give up- you're going to be OK!

Keep me posted with your progress

This doesn't sound like giving up- it sounds more like grabbing a lifeline and pulling yourself out of the pit. I'm so sorry you have descended that far into the pit.

Here's hoping you have landed in good, competent, caring hands, and that they'll help you get this sorted out. For me, just getting answers makes it easier to bear. Psychiatrists, of course, are M.D.s, so this one should be equipped to help you figure out the twitching. Does the anxiety cause it, or does it cause the anxiety? Could be fodder for a classic vicious circle.

Here's hoping better days are on the horizon.

Thank you both - and thanks to those who reached out via direct message. I appreciate it so much. My back twitched all night...and drove me to stay up for several hours. I guess it can be something called benign fasciculation syndrome. At least I'm focusing on the anxiety. Did you all see Jen's post (51)? She calmly (probably frustrated though) said she's got more problems. I can't do that. I am basket case extraordinaire! And it angers me that I might have brought these twitches on.
I do have a neurologist apt on June 4th. Perhaps between now and then I'll learn a little on anxiety.

Thank you again. Your kindness is appreciated beyond words.

My goodness 4 yrs & still searching? Don't beat yourself up & don't compare yourself to jen or anyone else for that matter.
You come on this board offering support, kindness, sharing, etc....
Your a strong giving person. We all have our Beasts to battle.
You may not be causing this twitching at all. So give yourself a break. Even if it is connected to anxiety your not inviting these problems they come when & to whom they choose.
Who would or doesnt feel anxious or depressed at some point through this crazy disease? After all both are on that questionare we fill out each visit. They are on there for a reason.
Don't under estimate yourself & dont be angry at yourself. This disease can dish out more then a person can handle. That's why we have each other.
I'm glad your getting help it's an awful scary place to be.
I wish there was more I could do. Been in that "pit". It's not where I'd ever want to be again.
So many things they simply don't know about RA. How do patients deal with this? It's not easy & we all know it.
No matter I do not believe you brought this on. There are things we simply can't control.
Really hoping you get some peace of mind. You deserve it.
Hugs
Sammy

Sammy said it so well. We don't ever ask for anything that is associated with this awful illness. Best of luck to you and keep us informed. May God Bless you immensely!
Wendy

Thank you all so much. I went to my first appointment but it wasn't anxiety counseling, it was a medication consultation. They recommend that I take klonopin at night to sleep (tiny dose) as it can calm the twitching and the anxiety down. They also want me to consider taking 10mg of celexa to start helping with the anxiety during the day.

I'll start counseling in two weeks.

Does anyone have experience with anxiety medication? I hope this helps with the twitching.

I do. Klonopin is a favorite of psychiatrists because it lasts very long so there is less chance for rebound anxiety. Rebound anxiety happens with the shorting acting benzos like xanax. I've taken klonopin for 20 years and IMHO is the best drug in it's class. Klonopin is also an anti-convulsant. Doc made a good choice with klonopin. I'm not familiar with Celexa though I've heard good things about it. An SSRI like Celexa may help with anxiety as well. Your doctor took the exact same route mine did when I started treatment for anxiety 20 yeas ago. His prescriptions should help. PM me if you have any questions.
G

G - Thank you!
I took only half of the .5 klonopin last night. Went to sleep nicely but woke often. However, my twitching was greatly reduced to just my calves.
I'll give the whole .5 pill a go tonight. I also just took the first dose of celexa. I'm leery of taking medication (since liver issues have been a problem with the Enbrel) so I'm glad the celexa is 10mg. They said normal starting dosage is 20mg.

It's weird because I started paying attention to my anxiety. Even as I type this, I'm bouncing a foot around like it's keeping a beat to a fast song. I caught myself last night at the dinner table tapping my fingers just as swiftly. I also paced as I was talking to my husband. It was unbelievable to see that I do, in fact, stress in a no-stress zone!

you probably get a LOT done in your life, no? :)

here's a hug and a high five for all your contribute to this list.

just think of your newest therapy adventure as a tool in your arsenal of good health.

hang in there

Depot

After I had my second child in 1989 I had a very scary panic attack soon after. I had a couple in my teenage years but the episodes were not dx'd as panic attacks.
Anyway- I was given a prescrip for xannax on an as needed basis.
I do my best to use coping skills to deal with my anxiety and as the years have gone on I have gotten good at it...but I have to say just having my xannax in my purse and knowing it's there if I need it and knowing within 15 mins it restores calm is enough to get thru my moment without it. If I do feel I must- many times I try a half first and it's enough.
wishing you all the best

bcatz- I am very familiar with both of those medications. I have been taking a half of a 1mg pill of Klonipin every night to try to help me relax enough to not lay there with my head racing non-stop along with the restless leg syndrome. Why I say I take a half is because she prescribes 1mg so that on nights (or at times) the anxiety is worse or I start having some chest pains due to anxiety I have the other half available. She prescribes 30 per month to use as I need them. I have also been on Celexa for a long time (20mgs) that has recently been increased to 40mg. I haven't started taking the higher dose yet, I don't know if I will but my doc suggested it and sent it to my pharmacy.

We just have to take it a day at a time and just keep building on to each day with new knowledge and new peace. Some are up and some are down and lately the downs have seemed to be winning, which is why she advised me to increase for awhile. It's great that you reached out and found some help. This stuff we deal with is not for sissies.

I wish you gentle hugs and a peaceful night- Donna

Have you tried the youtube mindful meditation videos?

bcatz, I'm glad the klonopin helped somewhat. It's probably the best benzodiazapine out there but doesn't work like xanax if you were ever to have a panic attack. You can, however. melt the klonopin under your tongue for quicker results. It doesn't taste bad at all. In fact I chew mine every night so it works a bit faster. A doctor told me about letting it melt under your tongue. I wish I had that doctor today. I drive to work every day falling asleep at the wheel. Both rheumys I've seen didn't so much as tell me to stay home when I have brain fog. They probably never heard of the term..lol Anyway that first shrink of mine would filled out anything I needed to get me short or long tern disability to protect my safety, These doctors today couldn't care less.

G - any chance to find a doctor that could help you? That's so sad that you are stuck between a rock and hard place!

Thanks for the tip on the klonopin. Stinks - I'll check youtube. And Sista - thank you so much!

Bcatz glad your having some positive results.
Combined with therapy you'll gain control I'm refusing to think any other way. When faced with life changing things we are forced to learn new or different life skills.
Can't help but think how many deal with this? More then we realize I'm sure. It manifests & shows in different ways depending on the person.
Therapy is a great tool through this. After all in so many ways we are robbed of the life we expect to have. Throw in stress of every day life & all the other BS it can throw at you.....
We grieve the lose of normal & the lose of control. I'm sure that can happen at any given time & it's not always easy to handle.
I'll just shake if stress becomes to much. Realizing after I must tense up. Tensing up can only cause more pain.
Our bodies react even without us realizing. We can't always control how our body responds.
your on your way to taking your life back. I'm so glad.
G,
That's awful. Your right docs have changed. It's amazing how hard it is to get from point A to point B some days. Same problem yesterday. Any major stress & im exhausted. Had to force my eyes to stay open once I started driving. That's to dangerous. Needs to be addressed by someone. Be careful.
Sammy