I did back when the possibility of RA came up in March. I swore I would never, ever take methotrexate. I knew what it was and I was convinced that it would do more harm than good. However, I did a lot of research about it, and my rheumatologist helped by answering a lot of questions I had before I could even voice them. This helped to ease my mind.

I can tell you, I did hesitate when I held those four little pills in my hand the first time. Then, I just did it, because I knew deep down that I needed to. I want a chance at remission and I can't have that if I let my fears win. I was terrified I would get sick or horribly nauseous. I didn't. I was surprised. And if you knew me, you would know that my biggest phobia in the world is nausea and vomiting.
It's a long story and I know the fear is thoroughly irrational, but I'll panic anyway whenever someone in my house comes down with a stomach bug. Knowing that I might cause myself to get that sick by swallowing those pills was not easy to push aside by any means.

Voice your fears, here or with your doctor. It takes the power out of them.

Hugs! And welcome to the board!

For whatever reason, whenever one of the drugs was prescribed to me, I had no fear - except for prednisone, which I only agreed to take for a 2 week time frame. Methotrexate, by itself did not help me. Biologics were added, and then relief finally came.

The purpose of the drugs is to slow/maybe stop the progress of the drugs, so that you do not become crippled, and damage to your joints.You say that you are still functional - that is great, and that is what you should want the level to continue at. If you wait until you become dysfunctional, it might be to late.

I never found methotrexate to be horrifying though I was very sensitive to it in terms of being tired and spaced out at first. I recall taking it on the weekend and feeling it days later. That quickly passed and the side effects went away. How much did the doctor prescribe? If you are nervous take 1/2 of the dosage this week and see if it bothers your system.

Thank you for your response. Im sitting here wanting to take the plunge and take the meds. I get freaked just thinking about it. Doesn't it seem like they could just make 1 pill as opposed to 4? Has anyone just started out taking 2 just to "introduce" it and see how i react to it and work my way up to the 4 tablets. As you can see it creates a great deal of anxiety for me. I know it seems silly to some, but its truly a great fear I am struggling with.

Gryd1963 your response must have came through while I was typing. lol. What you said was exactly what I was asking, just taking 1/2 the dose. I think Im going to do that. fingers crossed because I'm planning on taking it tonight at bed time. Thanks for your response and the idea.

It took me two years to get a diagnosis, and by then I could barely walk, dress myself or get out of bed.

When the rheumatologist said mthx, I was estatic! I had liver enzymes above normal, ending up moving and it took another few months to get on it. Then the oral didn't work very well.

But once I got on a full dose, I was so happy. Well, a full dose with a biologic.

I love mthx, I wish I could go back on it. Lots of energy, and little pain. Trust me, mthx is not worse than RA. Google some pics of RA deformities, and realize that is what is happening to your joints. And then be happy you live now, and you can take this drug.

I do hope you start taking it and relieves the pain and damage!

Char820, I'm now easily tolerating 20 mg (10 pills) a week. I just did it at a pace I could tolerate and function at. I began the process in May. Now I just pray that I can stay on this dose because it does help some in combination with rest and Enbrel. The Enbrel, on the other hand, I'm not so sure works very well anymore. Rheumy knows I'm stressed and going through major changes so wants to wait a little longer before switching biologics.

I didn't fear methotrexate the first time or this last time. I guess for me i feared the daily severe joint pain more and i needed and wanted relief. Good luck

I felt exactly like you.... first I was created out about having RA and still thinking I could push past it. I did take the meds but it took me 2 days to get up the nerve. The next morning my feet hit the ground and the pain was gone for the first time in months. I couldn't believe it. Now I'm facing that far again with taking biologics.... lol... but the pain is getting out of control bc I'm doing more and more...
Arava and plaquenil did work much better for me than MTX.... those two together have me more relief.

Best of luck.

Your post could have been mine a little over a year ago. Denial, fear, and anxiety. I was in the same boat when first diagnosed and prescribed methotrexate. Just about every person here has tried methotrexate one time or another. You really need to talk to your rheumy about your fears of taking this med. Starting with a smaller dose might just be what you need to ease into it. Just make sure your rheumy knows what your doing and is ok with it. I started with 6 pills a week, but had to get off of it 8 months later due to elevated liver tests. You can more than likely expect some diarrhea and maybe some nausea from time to time. My side effects got a lot better after being on it for a few weeks. I did have a couple minor mouth sores to. Mtx is an older drug and is used often as first line treatment for ra. I say just don't think about it and put those babies down the hatch. Just remember they are monitoring your blood veery 8 weeks or so to catch any problems. Any additional problems you encounter just get on the phone and call the doctor. I understand how you feel loud and clear. Good luck and hope you have some good success.

Since I also have a pretty sensitive stomach, I also did half the dosage the first week and did fine on that. The next week I added one more, then the next week I took the full dose. I didn't have a problem except feeling tired.

Thank you all for your replies. I know that some people have a hard time understanding the anxiety with the metho, but i have had sensitivity to medications in the past, but also the acceptance of the diagnosis is very difficult for me. I did go ahead last night and take 1/2 the dose and today felt ok. I was stiff for awhile today as usual and usual feet and ankle discomfort. There was a wave of nausea in the last afternoon, but other than that, no so bad. I have an appointment with my rheumatologist this Thursday. Im actually relieved now. I really appreciate all of the input and suggestions from everyone. Im not glad that others suffer with this disease, but its nice to not feel alone especially when I have the anxiety that goes along with it. My goal next week will be to take the whole dose. : )

when first put on mtx years ago i remember the rheumie saying a lot of folks can take a while to get to a therapeutic outcome and that I should not look for immediate results. she gave me pred as a bridge. of course when I returned a few weeks later I told her the pred cured me...it wasn't the mtx, it was the pred bridge of course...

there's nothing worse than taking something new that is supposed to be a fix and it causes immediate new symptoms (extra fatigue, a little brain fog, and queasiness).

you'll get there in case you are like me and it took a while for it to kick in.

also it helps to consider that as a chronic disease some folks might take this stuff (if it agrees with their liver) for what 20 or 30 years? it has been out as a dmard for RA for over 50. so don't worry about your loading trajectory - you'll get there. and don't worry about stops and starts for winter colds or what not. we have the rest of our RA lives to be on this stuff. it will all come out in the wash.

if it bothers your gut, don't hesitate to ask for injectable mtx, which is a cakewalk and easier on the tummy.

welcome!

depot