Pink - the first thing I want to say is how wonderful it is that you are looking for ways to help your SO.Basically, for what you need to know, I don't think it really matters which drug/dose they are on. The pills are probably methotrexate, a chemotherapy drug. The shots are probably a biologic. These do suppress immune systems,making us more susceptible to infections. I am very well controlled for my RA, so I do not worry to much about going out, but I would never go near someone who I know is sick, I do not shake hands with anyone. For a while, I was less careful, and came down with a nasty strep throat, and have zero idea where I got that. In the last 3.5 years, I have had one case of strep, and 2 sinus infections, no colds, no flu. I get to close or near my grandchildren if they have recently had certain shots.

My husband is always coming down with colds and flu. I do not ban him from the house, I just stay a few feet away from him. I have yet to catch anything from him.

For me, diet did not do anything to help. But, I try to eat organic, and healthy. Do NOT try to boost the immune system. Big no-no. We are on drugs that are suppressing our immune system.

I do seem to drop things - my grip isn't always the greatest. But, for the most part, I am lucky. I feel OK.

PS - That should read I can NOT get to close to my grandkids if they have had certain shots

HI! My advice is that some days are great and some days are not. He may be in pain one day, and hurting, but will not tell you that. He will continue on with his day, because he has to. But by the time he gets home he may be a little short with you, or very tired, from getting through work . Don't ask for to much from him on these days. It was a victory to get through the day. I know when I'm in pain I still want to be close to my husband, because he is my comfort zone. I will curl up in my heated blanket and watch a movie with him. He takes care of our children, so I can let my body rest. Little gestures at this time, mean so much. Just getting him something to eat or drink, so he doesn't have to move. Not asking him to make decisions is always nice. Stress can cause flair ups.
Good days are great! On good days you can open your own pill bottles or water bottles. Cook dinner and play. Bad days for me, my hands and legs hurt. I have swelling, and I just don't want to be touched because of the pain. I just want to lay as still as possible, and hope the medicine kicks in. I hope this helps.

I applaud you for being so thoughtful. The most important thing you can do is be understanding when your SO doesn't feel up to doing something or when they're forgetful, sad, or cranky.

The disease manifests differently in different people but it's important to know that it affects more than just joints. It may also affect organs, muscles, and connective tissue ... pretty much anything and everything. It is frustrating in its inconsistency. Pain can come on suddenly and move around quickly. You may feel like you have an awful case of the flu one day and you're fine the next. Flares may be very short lived or go on forever. It is not uncommon for people with RA to be forgetful, to suffer from depression or to be irritable because of how awful they feel and because the grieving process is never really over.

Off the top of my head, popular, credible, supplements include; curcumin (turmeric), B vitamins, vitamin D3, fish oil, vitamin E ... efficacy is highly individual and these supplements may help alleviate symptoms, but they will never treat the disease and prevent damage the way that DMARD's and Biologics do. I, personally, found no relief from these supplements, but most of them, I still take either because they might help/won't hurt, or because I, like many people with RA, am deficient in those vitamins. That said, my dog gets significant relief from these supplements and others for his OA. Diet is the same way, highly individual. For one person it's nightshades, for someone else it's dairy, for someone else it's carbs. For many people, diet has no impact.

Everyone's case and prognosis is different. The disease may be anything from mild to severe, well-controlled or not, and it may change over time. I suspect that most of the people you run into online have a moderate to severe case. I could be wrong, but when my RA was mild, I wasn't motivated enough to join forums or learn a lot about the disease.

I hope that helps ...

hey pink

welcome. very sweet of you to post re your partner. I hope these links help her - I find them useful.

I would not ramble two much about the homeopathic and say spice thing. yeah if its good for her general health and your life too.

. No if you are looking for a cure. RA patients tend to get bombarded with snake oil cures morning noon and night.

well if you two live together avoidance is not so possible. but say you do not and you are taking a car ride. probably not good if you are sick - investing in a few gloves and masks from CVS is helpful.

try these links if you like and welcome again

depot

http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/

http://www.anapsid.org/cnd/files/looksick.pdf

I have never found herbal supplements to do a thing for me. Even the really harsh biologics are overwhelmed by the severity of my disease. So if you are going to add some of these supplements to your SO's diet, please do not be surprised if they do nothing. Do not blame your SO, it is the nature of the beast.(RA)

Someone else mentioned how RA affects organs. One of the worst for me is my brain. It was actually the first symptom I had, over a year before I started getting joint flares. I lose my memory, my cognitive function is just gone. Plus, I lose impulse control. So I get mad I can't remember things - or maybe frustrated and it comes out as nastiness and anger.

I take a lot of vitamin and mineral supplements, and I rarely get colds. I have 4 grandchildren, and last year at Christmas, the day care grandkids gave the whole family a brutial cold, which turned into pneumonia for me, and bronchitis for my daughter, and left my other grandkids and their parents sick for months, as well as another son.

But I would rather be sick, than not hold my grandchildren. That is my choice. Zinc and Vitamin A & D are big ones to help me fight infections. I wonder if the zinc is making my RA worse? Hmm, I have to think about that.

I think it is wonderful you are supporting your SO through this disease. Just remember, it is a forever disease. It will never be cured, although if your SO is lucky, it can be put in chemical remission. So do not be looking for a cure - just trust that the doctors are doing their best. And if they aren't that might be the time to be an advocate, go to doctor's appointments and really learn more about this disease and how to address concerns, esp. if your SO has brain fog!

Remember this with colds and flu: you are highly contagious the day before you come down with symptoms. By the time you feel sick, you may well have passed it on already. Banishing yourself after the fact isn't necessary, just be careful about hand washing, sharing glasses or silverware, you know the drill.

You're a sweetheart to come here and ask questions.

Pink... i am on the other side. I have RA and have been a widow for 15 years ever since i was 39. I often wonder if people will want to date me. I find myself trying to hide my pain so others won't see my illness and i hesitate to bring it up to someone that i maybe dating because i often feel that it will be a deal breaker. My advice is...just being there come hell or high water is huge!!! Being understanding and compassionate goes a long way. Just be there. Good luck

Just be there and love your SO. Don't take things personally when your SO is too tired or grouchy. Try to make their life a little easier: do the cleaning they struggle with, open up new jars/bottles, etc, maybe sign them up for regular massage. . .