I know it's hard. You have to remind yourself that YOU are still YOU. Reach out to others - don't just wait for them to reach out to you. Meet people for lunch, go to a movie, have someone over for a chat. If you suddenly found yourself in a wheelchair, there would still be things you could do. It's not perfect, but nothing ever is.

As Yoda said, "Do or do not, there is no try". *lol, quoting a ficticious character)

Sorry your blue: It hits us all from time to time. We are still valuable and needed. We each have qualities that would be desired by others. We are just different. When we stack up what used to be against what is today it can be very humbling. I never feel better than when I can help someone else. If there is a VA hospital near you, a retirement home, a church with youth group, a hospital that could use help a few hours at a reception desk take the time to go there. I am sure there are tons of others the group could suggest. As a volunter you aren't held to standards as when you are paid. You get more slack so to speak when you are less than 100% but are still appreciated and NEEDED. Listen to the stories those folks have to tell. Something as simple as getting a cool drink for someone or listening to them can mean the world. Getting out even for a short period to be of assistance helps us all feel better about ourself and condition. Who among us on this site would not be there for each other in a heartbeat, why not for others? You have value, different than before for sure, but maybe greater than you realize and give yourself credit for. Find the new you, cause you are special! There are special people out there waiting for you to be a new freind for them.

It is hard. Believe me, I know where you are coming from. I hope that you learn to handle it well. Reach out to others and don't let life pass you by.

Hugs and best wishes for happy days ahead.

I love the suggestion of volunteering. I have been spending an hour or two on Saturdays, doing art therapy with a few autistic teen boys. Seeing the excited looks on these non-verbal boys and their moms telling me how much their sons look forward to coming is gratifying and gives me a slight "high," even on days when I'm hurting.
Couple RA with fibromyalgia, I have had to modify what I can reasonably expect of myself and enjoy the simple activities with select friends whom I know will be flexible and understanding.i

Bcatz is right, you are still you! Don't let RA get you down. Fight it!

You need to get out, call a friend, go out to eat, or to a movie. There are a couple funny movies out there. My daughter said Men in Black, was good, I saw The marigold Hotel, that was hilarious.

Lin

Hi Sharon I have the exact same thoughts.
I have friends family and coworkers but I am downright afraid to make plans!! I don't know what Saturday will feel like can I go to a movie and lunch? I have 2 people in my life who do not judge me when I need to cancel because its a "bad RA" day.
The other judgmental people I no longer make plans with. Those people who have no illnesses great for them but they dont sometimes know how to be compassionate to us who do :o(
I have 2 animals that I ADORE so when im home it doesn't really feel alone. Do u have animals? Anytime u want to talk I am here!!!
Xoxo MLC.

I'm very blessed w family n friends and a gf who r all there for me good or bad. They did 46wks of interferon n ribavarin w me and that crap was horrible. 1/2 thru that I got dx w RA and have been dealing w all that it brings. On bad days when I'm home alone n don't wanna "bother or whine" to ppl, I have a Pug her name is DeeDee my BFF gave her to me some months ago and I pet her n love on her and believe it or not it helps. She knows when I'm having a bad day. Some days she's more comforting than any med:)

Sometimes it isn't that people don't care, it is just that they have their own lives and problems they are dealing with. Because they don't see you in the places they used to, they just forget to let you know they still care. Also, some people are just plain awful at dealing with illness in others. I think they are afraid.

My world has shrunk a lot, too, but I think that isn't as hard for me because I am very much an introvert and I don't feel lonely as much as someone like you might. I think the suggestions other people have made are good ones. Don't give up. Don't let the RA win. Find ways to get the social interaction you need.

Me, I have three cats and three dogs, and they love me no matter WHAT kind of RA day I am having, lol. The cats are overjoyed when I need to take naps during the day . . .to them that's what everyone should do! :-D

It's a very lonely disease and yes you find out that true friends are hard to come by. Get a dog, my dogs saved me.....people, not so much.
Sue

Thank you all. Your support and understanding is great medicine. Today, i can look at all I'm grateful for. I'm working on acceptance. I do have a dog and he is great. Actually, if it wasn't for him there are days I wouldn't have gotten out. THANK YOU.

Meetup.com is a website for people of similar interests. You might want to give that a try. And give your dog a pet from me!

I have had numereous sugeries and procedures at the hospital, and volunteers are very much appreciated, and there are things that you can do that don't require you to be there at a specific time, so you could work around RA issues. Just going around and talking to the patients, especially the young or the elderly, would be super appreciated.
Pets are nice too!!