Rape Support Group

If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.

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/ Rape Support Group

what to say

nottoughenough
nottoughenough
A few months ago I went out with a coworker. I knew him for a little over a year and I considered him to be a friend. The first time we went out everything went great so we set up a second date. The second date, did not go so well. Long story, short.....I was raped. Work has been horrible. I have to see him every day and he acts like nothing ever happened. The problem is I found out another coworker is planning on going out with him next weekend and I don't want anything to happen to her. I've never spoke a word about this this until know and I don't know what to do. What do I do?? What do I say??
deleted_user
deleted_user
I understand how it is to have see your rapest every day, because I have to see mine. If your really worried about your coworker, write a note to her and leave it in her locker, but don't sign it. I hope i helped. If you every need to talk feel free to message me.
Tallcare
Tallcare
You are a very strong and courageous woman! Even though you don't feel like it, your compassion for your female coworker proves that your perpetrator didn't crush your kindness and compassion. It is a very difficult situation to be in. I have had to face my rapist on numerous occasions through different family functions. The most important thing is to take care of YOU. I agree that you should write an anonymous note to warn your co-worker. Make it urgent so she takes it seriously.
Again, the most important thing is to take care of you, do not put yourself in one more situation where you feel vulnerable.
I hope that this helps. Feel free to message me
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree that an anonymous note would allow you to inform her, allowing you to get your message across without her guessing or assuming about an alterior motive. The information gets to her and that's what is important. This can also allow you to be helpful without feeling vulnerable. I admire your concern for her.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I went through the same thing a coworker was working for my rapist and I told her but people do see the person they want to see. Unfortunately there's not much more you can do and I had done the note thing. It's so impersonal for people it's easy to ignore. Your best bet is to confront her and tell her that you don't think it's a wise decision and that you know someone personally that went on a date with him and he raped her. The problem is a lot of women have the mentality that it will never happen to me. I'm sure all of us here thought it otherwise we would have all been wearing rape whistles and chastity belts.