i'm so sorry that that happened to you....i was raped twice...the first time it was by someone i knew and the other time by a stranger.....after the rapes i put myself in risky sexual situations.....hooking up with a guy and having an affair-and i am NOT proud of that-and after i knew that he was cheating on me-after me broke up with that girl-i still stayed with him....i felt like i was trash and deserved to feel like it so i felt like what i did with my body didn't really matter....i hooked up with a guy that i knew in high school and almost got pregnant......i kind of give myself the submissive in any relationship because of my past.....but i'm becoming a stronger person now....i'm in therapy and i'm advocating for myself and i'm not letting people take advantage of me anymore.....i'm not in any intimate relationships now but i hope to be one day and i hope that when i do i'll still be a stronger person....if you wanna talk, please feel free to message me

You don't deserve to stay in a miserable situation! ..I know sometimes we add our issues to our problems. ..when in reality it was a situation that made us feel miserable! !..Sexual Assault is not only a serious crime...yet it is an illness to the one who is assaulted...because. .of the different emotions and the aftermath that we go through! Or going through...the suicidal thoughts. ....our life style...the nightmares...the relationship. ...and etc...sexual assault affects us tremendously and that is why we blame our selfs as well...it makes us to have personal problems with our inner selfs....and people in general...but do not blame yourself!

I've just split up with my partner of three years, I try and stay away from him but stupidly I always end up seeing him again but now I'm determined not to!

I was raped two years ago and my life fell apart. I lost my job and started drinking a lot. My boyfriend didn't seem to mind me drinking all the time as he likes drinking too so we would do it together. I would be embarrassed taking out the recycling as there was often loads of bottles of gin and vodka and empty bottles of cider in the bags. One evening we drank 3 bottles of gin between us.

Because we both did this I felt that our bad relationship was my fault too. He is a very abusive person and has done some terrible things to me but because I was a failure and couldn't keep a job and allowed myself to drink and take drugs I was as much of a mess as him and kind of deserved him behaving badly towards me.

He has a good way of putting down my family and friends and saying things that made me think they were a bad. So I stopped seeing friends and family and just spent all my time with him.

My best friends boyfriend raped me. She had invited me over for the night and I woke up with her boyfriend on top of me. I honestly believe she wanted this to happen as she had cheated on him and wanted it to be even with them. It went to trial so the police believed me but she stuck up for him and he was found not guilty. They now have a baby and are getting married.

So I don't trust people and my best friend did that to me. I spent all my time with him as I didn't want to be around other people because of her. So it's made my life difficult as I isolated myself, when he's awful to me I am determined to stay away from him and then I just get lonely. He apologises and grovels and says nice things to me, I don't get that from anywhere else so I just give in.

I'm glad I have found this site and I wrote a question yesterday, it's making me see sense when I write all this down. I'm starting to understand how bad he really is.

I honestly never gave it much thought until just recently to be honest. My therapist pointed out that I chose partners who treat me badly because it mimics the abuse I endured. It could also be because I feel like "damaged goods" and therefore don't seek out better relationships because if it.

Either way, I'm glad that you are seeking help. You should never stay in a bad situation. And you deserve to be happy.

yea I sort of get that on inverse you get these people who think they'll keep it up like partners and theyre not so it gets clammy, its like a magnet to them. you just have to push them out of the way at times. theyre not exactly healthy people inc concealment when people dont report things like dr,s religious ministers or do it together as they did, sorry if you help them and jerk me about you know when they threw the u.k. records away and all that ? it gives the feel of an unhealthy sexual relationship with youre dr too, where for some reason he had to help the religious minister and his other friend making excuses. they do that try to make you trash degrade like you came from the vice down the block etc.
stand there making excuses, theres nothing wrong, nothing happened, calls you a loon having delusions like when youre under anaesthetic and all that, tries insanity (really) at the mental health while the religion is lying there as well. but it is trying to take advantage I don't give a ..... about his career or bank account never touch me over a religion its basically the same. stands there going it dosent matter, im stil trying to work out how he had any decency even being involved with the others when they got sued even.
so indecent people do not treat you decently, its like well you helped them so you go on it with them and feels like that in any relationship of any kind, I gets like that with this guy my niece had in bed, we find the religion doing a rape enquiry and hes saying nothing happened when I was in an ambulance basically. its like well you helped them mate you wanted the fun too. it feels like why is that guy involved in my relationships please at all saying anything, pervert is he ? and it just feels dirty and creepy.
it shows they don't care as they protect their friends and religion and pay check so youre relationship is then f**** you too. youre supposed to be nice to a dirty ********** helping child abusers, and protecting others which shows he or they don't care about you.
then theres the screaming sessions when they start, he claims I was screaming , ok so I was hysterical is that a reason for a guy elsewhere to complain ?, and why does he care anyway whats in youre dirty mind ? its like that, their attitude changes as they get nasty to the victim for some reason, I assume they like rapists underneath it. its a bit like that.......