Rape Support Group

If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.

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Questions.

confused11
confused11

This is my first time coming out to others about what happened. It’s hurting my relationship and it’s been over 16 years that it happened. I was 8 at the time when a family member who was a little older than me starting doing some stuff with me. I didn’t think much of it and liked it. That’s the issue I’m having is that I liked it and have questioned sex ever since. It feels good but no it’s bad. My boyfriend tells me that he took advantage of me but I tell him that I liked it. It was something we called a game and would go away for a bit. This is my problem, he wants me to come out and talk about it but I don’t want to cuz I’m scared. I’m scared that I’ll be thought of as gross because I liked it and others won’t believe me. It’s been 16 years! It’s hard to recall my memories as an elementary kid, I feel as tho these thoughts aren’t real and try to forget but then I remember and they’re not. I just want to forget but my boyfriend says I need to work through it because it will haunt me. He is  super supportive boyfriend that he wanted to go to counseling with me for this, but i just couldn’t have him in the room. I just want to talk to others about this. I don’t think it was rape cuz I liked it? I’ll be getting counseling soon but it’s gonna take a while. I just wanna talk with someone. 

RISEUP2
RISEUP2
Hello there. I have a similar situation, so I can relate. You do need to go to a Counselor due to the continued hauntings of the past. Or we can talk right here until you take the step of talking to someone in person. I super down to earth, I am 29. I had a older man that messed with me probably at 3 yrs old. When I was about 7 yrs old I remember some things. But at 3 is when he came into my life. Anyway, the reason of saying that is because at that age you have no idea of how to feel. Someone took a part of you and your horomones as a woman were triggered early. Sex is for joy and reproduction. How would you know that at 8 yrs old. Well you don't, you were a child. It is not weird that it felt good, it was just not suppose to happen until you wanted to happen and that should be at a older age. 16 and up is that experimental and inquiring mind stage. Now you are confused. Don't be. it happened and if you find what I've said helpful, please let me know. I still need help in many ways. I did not seek help and when I tried certain things didn't work for me. I was angry for 5 years straight and one time in my life. I woke up one day after 5 years and I really believe God said I GOT YOU in my ear. And he has held me ever since, I fall at times and I try not to beat myself up at times. It will be a struggle until you cant talk about it. You have to learn how to talk about and what to share. Not everyone will understand your mind, your words and fears, the confusing thoughts. Its actually hard to express to others it hasn't happened to. You are not the only one. YOU are NOT ALONE!!!!