Rape Support Group
If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.
Hello, I am new here and was recommended I try a support group. Thank you for viewing and listening to me. It means a lot.
I am a survivor of Child Rape. I was 5 years old when it began from two men in my family, it officially stopped at age 12.
I am 22 now.
I can say I think this is the lowest I've been in a very long time. I recently spoke to one of the men that did what he did to me. I felt like I needed some sort of closure. Never in a million years would I thought I had the strength in me to do so, but I did. I accepted whatever his answer was, was never going to be an acceptable answer. I was right.. it felt like whatever hard work I did to get where I am today was gone in an instant. I have not been okay since. I feel dirty, I hate myself , I'm angry , I'm sad. I don't know how to do this. I know I am healing that wound and I have closed that door. But I'm so tired .. I have been in fight/flight all my life.
Any relationship with men I have tried to pursue I am filled with anxiety or I feel some sort of guilt for enjoying it or disgusted with myself. Or I am so hurt when all they want is to use me because they are "Horny" - because that was HIS reason for it. The hatred for myself is so much . "It's not my fault" I repeat .. i know this to my core..
Im lost. I truly am. Im at my lowest and im tired,but I wake up every morning get up go to work, but there is such a heavy and cold feeling inside.. a lot of sadness and loneliness...
I would like to speak so much but I was afraid there would be no one who would be intrested in to truly listen to me . I know being told that this happened to me , it's a lot for a person. I know. I know there's not much to say or "what could I say" I am here to voice myself. In hopes that maybe there is somebody, someone that will truly hear me .
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Middy is off for a bit so if anyone needs a CL please just give me a shoutSending a big hug...xo
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I was sexually assaulted as a kid. I find it hard to accept that another person's actions caused me so much harm. He made bad choices and now I am paying the price. Stupid PTSD!
I have a hard time with relationships with men as well. I work with a lot of men at work, and on a daily basis I find it hard because they truly don't understand. I have stopped dating altogether and have developed a hyper-independence.
I constantly blame myself for what happened, as I have often been told "you had poor boundaries", really men just know how to capitalize on vulnerability until they get what they want (or so that is my opinion).
Thank you for sharing.
It’s hard to think that no one will understand.. but we are out there, and many in here.
I was molested at 5 in front of two other kids… all of us were so scared, never spoke of it again..
When I was 13, I was brutally beat, and raped, then beat up afterwards…
I lived with the blame, and the lies that I was being punished for other things I did that must of been bad enough to be punished this bad…
I still have my days, but most days I’m pretty good, and the biggest thing I know (now) is I have told myself so many lies and believed them and I am my biggest enemy… it’s taken me years to know that I did nothing wrong, and everything I’ve survived stems from my past abuse.. I’ve endured many forms of different abuse, and survived..
Looking back, I know that while those things were really bad, terrible things, those things have shaped me to be the person I am now, and able to help others who have survived bad things too.
Like I said in the beginning.. you are not alone.. even when you think or feel like you are.. honestly, you’re not.
If you would like to chat more, or ask questions, ( how did you get to where you are now…. Or anything else) you’re totally welcome to drop me a message.
Hang in there… you’re heading in the right direction..
Notalone00