Well, I am sure I have some gifts from my grandfather lying around the house. I also have the number of one of my attackers in my phone and have not deleted it. It's weird, you would think I would immediately get rid of that number and I justify keeping it in my phone saying that I want to know that its him if he ever were to call so I wouldn't pick up but in truth, I don't think that is the real reason that I haven't gotten rid of it, I am not sure what the truth of that is. So no, you are not alone in keeping things that remind you of the attack. It may seem a bit weird to others but, I get it. It's kinda like you are looking for that tangible reminder of how far you have come, or something? I don't know. I haven't figured out why I am hanging on to this stuff let alone really able to hypothesize why others do it. All I can say with certainty is you are NOT alone.

i burned everything i wore the first night, even the shoes......which used to be my all time favorite pair
however, in my sock drawer, i have a small box that holds some of the things he gave me while we dated, i also have the things his little sister gave me, and for some odd reason i cant bring myself to dispose of them....

Wow, it does make me feel better not to be the only one so thanks for your replies, it also makes me more curious as to why?

My momentoe is my life,my exsistance.I tried to end my life to escape the rape and abuse I was constantly having to live with,I try to think that in some way,maybe me surviving has made my abuser think about how she was and change her ways too,I'm grateful to be alive.

I do carry a sort of momento from my father but, mine cannot physically be thrown away. Like my love of piano, which he introduced me to..it always reminds me of him, and I was very good a piano and loved it but now I cannot play without hurting.

I know this isn't the same thing at all but answer this. When you see the dress do you feel good or bad? No one should keep things around that make them feel bad right? If it would possibly give you peace get rid of it..or perhaps put it in storage?

I hung onto the clothes that I was wearing for a long time, they were just there at the back of the wardrobe for a couple of years until I finally decided to throw them out.

Don't know why I took so long about it, partly I just had to come out of denial about it all first and then for a long time there were so many other things to deal with - it just took me ages to even think of it.

I also threw out all his gifts around the same time (I smashed up one of them first, that felt good!)

I have a bag with everything connected to it - a couple books, some newspaper articles about rapes around my campus, journals, the papers from the hospital. And the bra and underwear I wore that night that the police kept. I washed them (it felt weird - I actually didn't want to) but put them in the bag. I don't want to wear them - it doesn't feel right, like the rape never happened, somehow. I don't know. But I don't want to burn them or throw them awa. I guess it's kind of proof that it did happen..? I don't really understand, but I'm glad it's not just me.