Rape Support Group
If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.
Many of you know that I write about my rape publicly and include some aspects of my healing in my blog postings which sometimes start out as journal or forum entries here at DS. I don't repost all of my journal entries, just a small minority that have been scrubbed for public consumption. In addition to my own blog, I am also the resident male rape survivor blogging at Remodel 4 Life, a collaborative blog for survivors of rape, CSA and other forms of abuse.
The founder of Remodel 4 Life also founded the Carnival Against Sexual Violence, which is published twice a month and highlights interesting or noteworthy blog topics related to the subject. The use of the word "Carnival" is in keeping with the theme of the website Blog Carnival, which includes many different topic areas all referred to as "Carnivals". There is a blog carnival for any topic you can imagine at: http://blogcarnival.com/
Please don't be hung up on the term "carnival" as the subject matter is anything but light or carnival-like.
My blog entry on "A Fallacy of Choices" about the mistaken belief that I chose to be raped by not fighting back hard enough was nominated and selected for this edition. The entry was about how I framed my self-preservation instincts and unwillingness to hurt an innocent third party at my own expense and the way I then made excuses for the shame I felt at not stopping it. I am not sure who nominated it, but I am thankful that a neglected and often belittled group of rape survivors (male rape survivors of female rapists) is getting a little attention in this edition of the carnival.
Sometimes the belittling and shaming comes from other survivors who only recognize rapes that look like their own; beta male wannabes who feel that acknowledging they are also at risk will make their little penises shrivel up and drop off; disgusting shamers who believe that rape is not traumatic to men and will mock any man who breaks the silence; and a small, but vocal community of non-survivor feminists (faux feminists who cannot grok their own philosophy of equality between the genders) who believe that any discussion of male rape victims should be silenced immediately even if that means shaming and abusing male rape survivors themselves in order to achieve that end. Yes, I have experienced such treatment from all four demographics in varying levels since speaking out.
Of course, the general topic of my blog entry is not male victim - female rapist specific, but I don't hide the fact that my experience is such in my postings. No one gets my silence anymore no matter how much they shame or mock me. I will not hide or downplay certain aspects of my experience to soothe the wounded egos or disgusting agendas of those who wish to believe lies and myths about rape and certain types of survivors and rapists. Female and male rape survivors should both be able to relate to the content of my blog entry - especially if you are one those individuals who was not beaten into submission and was subsequently shamed by those who ignorantly believe it isn't rape if you aren't hospitalized for a week afterward or if your rapist had the "wrong" genitalia.
The links are available here:
http://abyss2hope.blogspot.com/2009/02/carnival-against-sexual-violence-64.html
http://jameslandrith.com/content/view/3345/79/
http://remodel4life.blogspot.com/2009/01/fallacy-of-choices.html
The founder of Remodel 4 Life also founded the Carnival Against Sexual Violence, which is published twice a month and highlights interesting or noteworthy blog topics related to the subject. The use of the word "Carnival" is in keeping with the theme of the website Blog Carnival, which includes many different topic areas all referred to as "Carnivals". There is a blog carnival for any topic you can imagine at: http://blogcarnival.com/
Please don't be hung up on the term "carnival" as the subject matter is anything but light or carnival-like.
My blog entry on "A Fallacy of Choices" about the mistaken belief that I chose to be raped by not fighting back hard enough was nominated and selected for this edition. The entry was about how I framed my self-preservation instincts and unwillingness to hurt an innocent third party at my own expense and the way I then made excuses for the shame I felt at not stopping it. I am not sure who nominated it, but I am thankful that a neglected and often belittled group of rape survivors (male rape survivors of female rapists) is getting a little attention in this edition of the carnival.
Sometimes the belittling and shaming comes from other survivors who only recognize rapes that look like their own; beta male wannabes who feel that acknowledging they are also at risk will make their little penises shrivel up and drop off; disgusting shamers who believe that rape is not traumatic to men and will mock any man who breaks the silence; and a small, but vocal community of non-survivor feminists (faux feminists who cannot grok their own philosophy of equality between the genders) who believe that any discussion of male rape victims should be silenced immediately even if that means shaming and abusing male rape survivors themselves in order to achieve that end. Yes, I have experienced such treatment from all four demographics in varying levels since speaking out.
Of course, the general topic of my blog entry is not male victim - female rapist specific, but I don't hide the fact that my experience is such in my postings. No one gets my silence anymore no matter how much they shame or mock me. I will not hide or downplay certain aspects of my experience to soothe the wounded egos or disgusting agendas of those who wish to believe lies and myths about rape and certain types of survivors and rapists. Female and male rape survivors should both be able to relate to the content of my blog entry - especially if you are one those individuals who was not beaten into submission and was subsequently shamed by those who ignorantly believe it isn't rape if you aren't hospitalized for a week afterward or if your rapist had the "wrong" genitalia.
The links are available here:
http://abyss2hope.blogspot.com/2009/02/carnival-against-sexual-violence-64.html
http://jameslandrith.com/content/view/3345/79/
http://remodel4life.blogspot.com/2009/01/fallacy-of-choices.html
The way I've always seen it, acknowledging that this happens to men as well is crucial if society is ever going to get past the common myths/misconceptions about rape - in other words, IT BENEFITS WOMEN AS WELL!
(Sorry for the capitals there, this is just something I feel strongly about.)
It is just offensive and ridiculous for some of these folks with agendas not related to prevention of sexual assault or helping those who've been victimized to stick their noses in the middle of something they cannot possibly understand simply to make a political or social point at our expense. In short, they are using rape survivors - not helping them. I don't need that kind of "help".
And yet, they still do it shamelessly...