Rape Support Group

If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.

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Breaking down everytime I drink

Banffgal
Banffgal
I know drinking isn't the best thing to do when you are down, but lately everytime I do I start crying and end up needing to talk to someone about what happened. Even if I never was thinking about getting raped that day as soon I get liqour in me I think about it.
I havn't even told anybody what happened until the last few months (It's been 1 1/2 years)

I know the logical thing to do is not drink but I can't even have a few social beverages without losing it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I understand. I think a part of me knew the only time I would talk about it is when I was slightly intoxicated. I know it's hard, but PLEASE try to go talk to someone about it. I waited nine years. Nine years too long.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think it sounds as if it was time for you and it just squirts out uncontrollably when your uninhibited. I suggest getting a therapist so you can talk in a safe place without the use of a depressant. Once you are able to get it out you might find it doesn't squirt out when you are not looking. talking about it is hard and I think you should consider yourself very brave.
30pieces
30pieces
Hmmm...being a recovering addict/alcoholic and a survivor of a gang-style rape, I would have to say your first job is to stop drinking. It's obvious in my own life that alcohol served me as a depressant. Sure, it 'braced' me so I could deal, but isn't the point of this whole site to deal with our traumas without aids, honestly?
Being an alcoholic, I would never -- NEVER -- push my diagnosis on anyone. but to me, in my head, you should just not drink altogether. It's hard -- I teach at the college level, and the pressures to drink with fellow instructors can be great -- but it is better for me. That being said, drinking may not be your problem. But if it intensifies negative emotions or feelings, it might be.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't know, but my guess is that you're probably doing a very good job of holding it in the rest of the time, so having a few drinks is what 'allows' you to let it out.
Have you been for any kind of counselling yet? I think the important thing is to find some safe way of getting it all out of your system.
Banffgal
Banffgal
Ya I go to counselling bi-weekly. It's hard, really hard. Make's it real when all you want to do is push it away...
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know how you feel exactly. Everytime i drink i feel the need to validate that what happened wasn't my fault. Its all i do because i am still guilty. I still feel like something that i did made him and his friend do what they did to me. I would love to talk to you if you want. Because everything you feel i feel too. add me.
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