Rape Support Group
If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.
sooo i don't know where else to post this and sorry this is kinda long...........so i had a pretty good weekend....i spent it with my family baking cookies.......we baked A LOT.......let me give you a little background before i explain what happened this weekend......i have an uncle that my aunt married and about 6 years he and i talked for a long time, like 3 hours.....since then he has seemed to favor me......gives me a big huge hug and a kiss when we see each other and tells me how wonderful it is to see me.......for the past year it makes me really uncomfortable, becasue it seems like whenever we see each other he finds some reason ot touch me.....now inapprpriatly, but it makes me so uncomfrotable.......i had a dream a few months ago where he sexually abused me or raped me......and now whenever i get uncomfrotable and i alwasy think that he;s going to....so this weekend the whole side of my mom's side was over at my other uncle's house.....saturday morning thus uncle arrived and as ususal he gave me his huge hug and a kiss and told me how wonderful it was to see me......as the day went on he was taking pictures.....there were times when he only took pictures of me.....i was being sitting there talking and he would square the camera on me and snap pictures....i would laugh and i'd hear the clikc of the camera and see the flash.......i knew it was him, he was the only one taking pictures......i was so uncomfrotable...this happened the whole weekend........my oldest cousin had a baby and i was holding the baby and my uncle came behind me rubbed my back and then put his hand down to the bottom of my shirt.......i couldn;t do anything......on Thanksgiving my uncle came by and hugged me.....just hugged me for about 5 minutes and i had no idea what to do......all weekend my uncle found an excuse to touch me.....he sat next to me at dinner on saturday and put his hand on me......i'm really uncomfrotable and i have no idea whtt to do!!!!! teeling anyone in my family is out of the question....thye would say i'm overreacting.....maybe i am......the thing is i feel like if i tell him soemthing or make an excuse to get out of the contact i feel rude......i feel like i't being mean.....i can't seem to find a reason of why i don't deserve it.......the contact feels so wrong and i feel so uncomfrotable when he does it, but i can't seem to find a reason why he isn't allowed to do it.....does anyone have any advice or anything to offer?????i'm kinda scared to go to parties now......
I think first, that your uncle,his inappropriate actions, his strangeness, etc. Might remind you of a situation you were in/ or of someone that hurt you. You thought you were safe, didn't expect to get hurt, etc. His innappropriate behavior are all red flags, and do not make you feel comfortable or safe at all. Only back in danger.
secondly,
It could be possible that he may have hurt you in the past, or has just always made you uncomfortable, and you are now noticing the signs of his inappropriate behaviors.
I had this happen with a sales guy at work. He would go OUT OF his way to touch me if he had to walk by me. Always touching my back, my sides, smiling weird at me. I know he never did anything to me, but thats no excuse to be a creep! If youre not comfortable talking to your family, any older cousins maybe, or those that married into the family... call a sexual assault hotline. You can always talk to them 24hrs. You don't have to say your name. This might be a good way to get it off your chest. Your regular doc/therapist to of course.
Youre not alone ;) I'm here for you. hugs...