I think being aware of an illness makes it worse sometimes for some people. Sometimes you can cut yourself and not know it until you see the blood. We all tend to worry a little more than usual too. Was that too heavy? Did I do too much? And the list goes on. We're all here for the same reason, because we need the support from other people, and we need to not feel alone.

I wouldn't try to convince myself that I'm not sick, because then you start neglecting what your body is trying to tell you.

You're not alone here, there are many of us going through this together in our own different ways.

I hope today is not too bad of a day for you.

I haven't thought that, but the people around me have, and so you need to stop it. it is very common for us with PTC to be mistreated by our friends and family who think that our symptoms are in our heads. I have had more than one person call me a hypochondriac and I know I'm not the only one here. if you second guess yourself, you will be playing into the abusive things that unempathetic people say and do to us. I know this is new and you are adjusting, but you have to trust yourself. it is part of this illness to become very sensitive to everything, our external environments, and our internal environments. it is a form of self protection, to tune in so that we can feel some control over this illness as we start to figure out our triggers. at the first sign of a headache you want to make sure you address it and what triggered it and how to manage it to keep it from being worse. your attention is focused now, and then this becomes intuitive. perhaps you are simply in the process of developing this skill?

Thank You. This is just so new to me and I think I am still in the denial stage of "this can't be happening". "I can't take this". "It's too much." "How can I get out of this".

So far my mom, my neuro ophthalmologist, and others I have told with the exception of one person has taken me seriously and understands my pain is real.

However, I did deal with another chronic pain where people told me it was all in my head and it took me five years to find a doctor to do surgery to get relief. So I understand.

Thank You for your support. Today is worse than yesterday. :( I hope you guys are doing better!