It sounds like your life is a carbon copy of the way my life use to be about a dozen years ago. I tried quitting hundreds of times on my own and I failed each and every time. I finally confessed to my doctor and she refered me to outpatient treatment which helped me tremendously by healing my underlying issues.

You don't say how much you are taking but I started out taking two 5 miligram vicodin twice a day and 3 years later, I was taking five 10 miligram vicodin, 3 times a day. I almost died. and spent 3 days in the hospital with renal failure. With iv's going into me, my kidneys began working again, thank God.

You need alot of support. Nobody can do it alone. If you need to talk, don't be afraid to ask me anything. I know what you are going through and I am here to help.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

God Bless

Thank you....I'm slowly taking myself off but the withdrawals are terrible. I can't go to a rehab because I'm a single parent. I'm afraid if I go to a dr they will take my kid from me

I dont think rehabs make any difference. Your only going to quit if you want to do it. You just have to have the willpower to do it. Keep reminding yourself it will only get better. Remind yourself the withdraws wont last forever. Keep busy to keep your mind off it. In the end it will be worth it. I know how it is you dont want to function without them, cant get out of bed, cant do anything. Wouldnt you love to live sober and feel good every day? Not waste so much money? Its tough but the reward is worth it.

I am addicted to opiates as well. I'm now 5 months clean, well almost. What helped me was getting on methadone. It kinda sucks because my body is now dependent on methadone but I'm so grateful that I'm now not spending and sometimes loosing a ton of money. I'm not craving them every moment of the day, I'm not getting in risky situations to get them. I'm not experiencing a ton of anxiety because I'm without. Addiction is hell. I couldn't do it without methadone. I've tried so many times. I understand everything you're saying. It's so tough! Check out suboxone or methadone or even a non controlled substance, naltrexone. Hugs!!

Yes I have been told that but I don't have the $ or insurance to go to a dr