Premature Birth Support Group
Premature birth is defined medically as childbirth occurring earlier than 37 completed weeks of gestation. About 12 percent of babies in the United States are born prematurely each year. The shorter the term of pregnancy is, the greater the risks of complications. Infants born prematurely are at a greater risk for developing serious health problems such as cerebral palsy,...
Hi. I joined this group after delivering my twins (a boy, Kai and a girl, Anika) at 34 weeks last tuesday. Both had no breathing issues and were decent weights boy-5lbs3oz, girl-4lbs11oz. Originally I was told that they would have to be in the NICU for 2-3 weeks but since they are taking all nutrition by bottle the pediatrician seems to think they may come home by Nov. 26th making their stay in the NICU around 10 days.I was wondering, do any of you mommies out there have any advice/experience on how to get through NICU time with your sanity intact?) I can't help but feel overwhelmed every time I go in to see them. I am still so guilty and angry at my body for not cooperating and keeping them in longer, and every time one of them struggles with anything it absolutely kills me. Our little boy is a much better feeder than our little girl for example, and while I know that some of this is because he was a little bigger at birth it's still heartbreaking to see her lag behind even a little. The nurses try to be realistic with you which is good but also sometimes makes you feel awful. What were your experiences with the NICU and do you have any tips?
It is hard for mums and dads no matter how long their babies are in NICU. No-one really expects it to happen to them... Jacob couldn't breastfeed, not because he couldn't on his own as such, but because of all they did to keep him alive (being intubated, fed via IV line then nasogastric tube for months) He only suck fed for a day before release... So I feel for you! I had to express for 5 months until my supply hit the deck, just like with my firstborn (term baby girl). If you are pumping, a double pump will be your best friend in terms of milk supply and time management. You have the added difficulty of two babies. See if they can split the cares time so you can do the cares for both your bubs. I am presuming they are healthy enough for that? My boy was quite a while before I could touch him, but he was very sick.
The biggest thing is to take a break if you need to. The nurses are beautiful and they are so loving with our babies. Right now, your babies need the time they spend with you to be warm and relaxed - even if that means you take a day off!! You need to look after YOU and when you get home, it will be a LOT harder. So take the time now and don't feel guilty. Life with a preemie is so different. Some of the mums had twins they got to take home, some were like me and didn't get both. It will be very time demanding, and you have to think of so much more than parenting a term baby (avoiding shops, flu season etc) preemie life doesn't stop when you walk out the hospital doors.
But chin up hun, you got your babies at 34 weeks and that is a HUGE achievement!!!! :) They are fully developed by 36! Like you said, no breathing issues, just some suck issues. That is a GREAT start!! It may not feel like it, but after spending 4 months in NICU and watching so many babies leave before us, then watching some pass away before leaving NICU, it really puts things into perspective. I feel for you with the stress of them struggling. Jacob had 9 blood transfusions, needed blood work 3 hourly, constantly having apnoea, desats, bradys, cynosis etc and all the specialist testing was something else... blood in stools, in urine, brain haemorrhage, pulmonary haemorrhage etc I have a really big list and the pain of watching them struggle is awful. It really is. I can't help you with that pain, but know that in a few short weeks your babies and yourself will have found out what life together is all about. You will never forget the NICU experience, but you are so close to going home! I think the first 4 weeks has been hardest for us "long term" mums, so I don't know what to say to you. Our biggest hurdle each day was getting through it with our son alive, by the time we were a week or so off discharge I was so drained (my girl was only 11 months when he was delivered) and busy that it took my mind off anything else. So take some time to breathe, to appreciate how healthy they are, to grieve that you did not make it to term and had to spend time in NICU (yep, we really do grieve over that and it really is ok to cry!!!) NICU teaches a mum patience she never knew she had. And that is patience you will need with your preemie babies.
Always jump on here and give us a shout if you need to talk :) We all understand how much it sucks having a baby early!! And we can all speak medical lingo with you, so you may feel more at home talking here than with friends who are well meaning but just don't understand xx
Just a quick update: Kai came home today and his sister Anika will be home by Saturday! It will be tough for these few days with her in the NICU still but my husband and I will take turns going to the hospital so it should be fine. They're both gaining weight and feeding so well! All tests and screens were passed and I'm so grateful that they are so healthy!
Happy Thanksgiving to you all!
xo
-Emily
They will be home so soon together, for that you are very blessed! Many of the twins don't get to leave close together. That is really wonderful!!! xx
xo
-Emily