Not often now, thankfully, but I went through a time when it did happen often. Really a challenge. My therapist said it was part of my grief process (denial-anger-bargaining-depression-acceptance) to put a positive light on it. In that process, it's what comes before acceptance.

It wasn't a night to day change, but with acceptance in therapy work in waking hours, the depression gradually receding on awakening, thank goodness. Support to you in this, Cecil.

Honestly? I think it's kinda half and half for me.... I wake up so tired that depression sorta follows.... and b/w that and the whole PTSD process, and then the fact my meds are at lowest levels at wake-up time? Yep. I can just lie there and wonder "Why exactly do I have to bother?"
Then I remind myself that if I don't bother, I'm the big loser on that one, and despite it all---and some ofi t's been kinda big---I have yet to go a day without leaving bed before noon, showering, putting on fresh clohes, tending my personal hygeine, etc.---and while that sounds petty to some, for a lot of folks who hit where I was at, even doing that was a no-go. So that's my personal pep talk. "I ain't quit yet, and I ain't gonna!"

Over time, the days I feel *that* bad have come less often and less intensely.

Gentle hugs and sympathy. You're not alone!

Leo, I get the personal hygiene thing. It's a good weekend when I shower and get dressed. I had been much better about that until this past weekend.

Next weekend I promised a friend that I would do photos at her daughter's sweet 16. I can't back out so I hope my mood improves.

I changed my underwear today, and brushed my teeth.

yes, yes, yes! This is me and I have posted a few threads about it. As soon as the eyes open an overwhelming crushing depression is with you immediately and you wish you had never woke up. If you are not seeing a doctor, go see one. My doctor explained to me that depression is a chemical imbalance, you cannot get better by talk alone, you need meds to balance the chemicals again. I still struggle with depression and did try going off meds. It did not work and I diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. I was advised that I would be on meds for the rest of my life. The doctor told me that with 1 episode of depression you have a 25% chance it will return, with 2, it is 50% after that it is 100% certain it will happen again. No shame in asking for help and taking meds to help get you well again. I certainly have more good days than bad. I right now I am having a bit of rough time, but it will pass.

CC,
I see a psychiatrist as well as a psychologist. I am on generic lamictal and actually it has helped a lot. I take it in the morning but maybe I should switch to taking it at bedtime???? It doesn't seem to make me wired or tired so I could give it a shot and see if it helps.

I wake up like that sometimes. I think my past haunts me in my dreams and so I wake up thinking I will feel that way broken forever but yes as the day goes on I see things in life worth living and feel better usually. I have a list on my bedroom door so I can read it before I leave my room and go into the world for the day. It is a list of everything I am greatful for. Do you think this might help?

The little girl photo you chose is adorable. Sad because she looks angry but still adorable.