Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
due to my years of addiction my oldest child has behavioral issues and alot of ptsd and anger which is super hard to deal with because ive suffered from the same things since i was 4 years old thats when the first of my trauma happened my mom also was in her addiction back then. at age 12 i turned to drugs to fix how broken i felt and to escape having to be me and ive battled those demons and my addiction ever since this is the first real recovery ive ever had... back to the point ive done a lot of damage to my mom and my children i try with everything in my being to repair what i have broken in my life and in theirs but on some days i feel so defeated and helpless when it comes to her and the behaviors she has. once something triggers these melt downs its sooo hard to get her to come back she gets physically violent and damages things around her or puts hands on those trying to get her to do anything...this morning she threw a huge fit becuase she didnt want to wake up for school because she waited til i was asleep and stayed awake almost all night watching youtube it was a battle that resulted in her kicking and clawing me her screaming at 630 am and me having to call into work cuz i couldnt get her to stop or to go to school....ive called the counseling service in our area the one she sees already doesnt seem to help....its like the better i get the worse shes getting and it breaks my heart because its mostly my fault i know she feels badly after her blow outs but they are getting out of conrtol i just want her to be happy and feel good about herself and not carry so much hate around its taken me 15 years to finally start learning how to deal with mine i want to help her so she doesnt have to repeat that horrible cycle....i know im doing the best i can but some days like today i feel like i cant do this and all i can think about is how to escape my own feelings i know thats never the answer but thats where my brain takes me when i feel like im failing i can handle a lot of my short commings but after how shitty i use to be i cant handle feeling like im failing my children ever again they desrve the best of me always and days like today i feel like i failed...anyways thanks just needed to get that off my chest.. on that note i didnt have to pick up an use today 258 days clean and sober
I think that the fact that despite how bad of a day you had that you still didn’t pick up & use is a wonderful step in the healing direction
You being able to be sober & present for your loved ones in times that they may stumble or fall could be a huge step moving forward in the healing of all
One day at a time, one moment at a time
Sending support & a hug <3
As for your parenting, I'm the adult child of PTSD parents who didn't work on recovery and sobriety like you are. In addition to weekly broken bones, broken household items, and broken windows due to domestic violence eruptions inside the house, it got life threatening outside of the house. For example, one of my father's suicide attempts involved us all, as he drove the whole family in our car into a flooded river. We had to be rescued by farmers with a tractor. It was nuts.
I would have given anything for a parent like you who is trying to hard and being humble enough to reach out for help like you are. I hope you can remember I said so every time it's tough and there's screaming at 630am and you feeling like you're failing. You're not.
Have you suggested a group for teens of alcoholics? Therapy is great but relating on the same level with peers, I find, is more productive.
Regardless, you're doing great. Tomorrow is a new day, hugs.