I just had to fill monthly prescriptions yesterday for two months because of looking ahead to how i'll be in Mexico for two months this summer instead of being in the US like I'm used to doing. It made me anxious, too. I have two herniated disks in my back, one up high between my shoulder blades and the other one down low like most people. I had three doctors' appointments this week, two just yesterday, and talked about pain management with my docs.

You wrote, " I'm like inner-freaking out until the refill is in my hand. It's like, in order to deal with one monster (back pain) I have to hold hands with another (pain meds)... The whole while my PTSD makes me depressed and anxiety ridden..." That really spoke for me and my last 24 hours, I can tell you. Thanks for posting about this. Sorry you're going through it, too, but we're not alone.

♥♥♥ Great to see you:)

Girl, one of my meds is on a 30 day refill basis. I have my doctor fax it to the pharmacy 5-6 days ahead of run out time. The pharmacist can refill it a few days before the full 30 passes, so I check a few days later. Took awhile to learn all this, but hopefully you can do the same. PTSD does love its travelling companions, with the two favorites being depression and anxiety. I periodically get spinal steroid shots for my back problems if a flare occurs. So far, so good. Healing and comforting hugs.

Yah, except my doctor's office doesn't respond in a timely manner. I think they're just sitting around laughing at me. The pharmacy is so sick of me. And, anytime I actually have back pain, when I need my meds, I am a monster to deal with. I've gone through three nurse practitioners that said I'm an attitude problem. My shrink got so mad when I told him that. Me, w/ my master's degree - a problem. I just want some fucking help. I want to not be laughed at. I want to not be treated like a druggie. I want my body fixed. I have been going through this medication hell for five years with NP's dosing down my pain medication because it was "nonspecific back pain." Then, I saw a pain specialist recently for the first time, diagnosed me immediately! Correctly! For the first time in 5 years! Then, my NP said she "doesn't believe him." EXCUSE ME you are an NP and hes a doctor. I didn't know they could do that!!! My pain specialist told me to find a new primary care physician. I did. I thought everything was going to start goin my way. He gave me the original dose of pain meds, because when I'm in pain and w/ my PTSD I'm bed-ridden. My elderly parents take care of me. I try my best but my attitude is shit when I'm in pain. It's so easy to just lay here on rock bottom. Cuz this is where I keep being sent. So, I asked him if he could refill my meds on Friday instead of Monday for my nerves. He was talking through his receptionist. She was laughing. He said "I'll refill them when they're ready to be refilled. I literally have zero problem except this fucking pain medication. No one understands my PTSD doesn't see it like normal people see it. I am going to have anxiety all weekend over this. Then there's probably going to be no car here on Monday or something stupid! You know! Now on top of it all, my pain specialist won't tell my new PCP my condition without a new referral to his office...? "But, I've already been seen by him..." That doesn't matter. New PCP new referral. It's like the WORLD doesn't want me to ever get better!