Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
If you haven’t read this book, it’s triggering but it’s worth the read. Being in a new situation, having seen a counselor that unknowingly perpetuated my spouses gaslighting techniques because I have a past, has had me questioning so much. She would tell me to trust my gut at the end of each individual session but she also told me things may just be in my head because we can’t read minds. I am still struggling to work through that. This book is terrifyingly eye opening.
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Lately I've been feeling scared and full of anxiety. I recently found a lump under my nipple. I hurt my back too. I'm in the process of moving. I'm run down. Everything is hard
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Just wanted to give a thank you to Mid, Arfie, Malibumark, Greeneyes, Mlro, Girlincalif, and Suncloudjd! You all always have such helpful tips and advice, but I always forget to write on my posts when I see you post, lol. I would lose my head if it wasn't attached to my body, lol. Thank you all so much! I'm starting to use my AI app as a sounding board again. I used to use it as that before...
I haven't read the book, but I've put myself through quite allot of therapy hoops attempting to find peace with my fears. When I take my fear in the spirit of a warning claxon. it is far less frightening. Like the smoke alarm in my kitchen, the claxon will sound for burnt toast as easily as it goes off for an electrical fire. Investigate, act if needed and move on. KISS KISS. Keep It Simple, Sweetie.
I've been through even more therapy hoops to deal with self-gaslighting. I started therapy with full Trauma Induced Amnesia and, girl howdy, that makes for gaslighting far more deceptive than anything other folks can throw at me. Those repressed memories kept leaking through in subtle deceptions that were less predictable than a fog bank. You say, "Apple" and I hear "Battle."
Good thread, Mariah. Thank you. I'm in the middle of a large and expensive project which is solidly intertwined with ethereal family dynamics. I especially needed the reminder to keep my fears and anxieties in check and to ask before I assume.
(This worked with my kids. The other parents laughed at me, but we were at the school bus stop/local park, and my son came over to me. All the other kids seemed busy doing something different so I asked him what was up. He said that there was a strange guy and the other kids were going to chase him with sticks. ALL the other parents jumped up. I'm 99% certain that the man was either mentally retarded or had schizophrenia, but I don't know for sure. What I know...is that MY kid was the one that did the right thing.)
https://gdba.com/child-safety/#how-do-i-change-what-ive-taught-my-youngster-about-talking-to-strangers
How do I change what I’ve taught my youngster about talking to strangers?
Question:
After years of telling my five-year-old daughter ‘‘never talk to strangers,” how do I begin to say ‘‘now it’s ok to talk to strangers”?
Answer:
Well, it can’t be too many years, given her age, but let’s imagine that she’s had a fairly clear concept of strangers for a year or two. Just like you, her perception of what “stranger” means changes as she grows up and learns more. Many young children describe a stranger as “a man with black clothes, dark hair, a beard, a gun,” etc.
The goal is to move to change your daughter’s focus off strangers and on to behavior. For every stranger who would harm your daughter, there are millions who will not, so strangers are not the issue. I suggest that you pursue opportunities for your daughter to communicate with strangers in appropriate environments. Children thus learn what feels comfortable and what does not. Such learning can be aided by a parent who watches a child communicate in a restaurant or store and then discusses the encounter afterward. “What did you think when that guy stood so close? I thought he seemed strange; I wasn’t comfortable with him.” Or, “I felt safe with that man at the next table who talked to us; did you”
One mother I know regularly encourages her seven-year-old son to approach strangers, giving him small challenges such as, “Can you find out what time it is?” or “Can you get directions to the nearest frozen yogurt place?” Then she stands back a bit and observes as he selects a person to ask. Afterward, they discuss why he chose who he chose, how the exchange went, if he felt comfortable with the person he spoke with, if that person was comfortable with his approach, and so on. Her son has safely rehearsed all kinds of encounters with people.
Could it be that this boy who actually approaches strangers in public is less likely to be a victim than someone taught never to talk to them? Absolutely yes. Let me know how things go with your daughter.
https://www.mosaicmethod.com/
When "Stranger Danger" came into vogue in the early 80's, I was appalled. As a child prostitute, my familars were mostly pimps, Johns, Janes and fellow prostitutes. Odds favored random strangers as being a social upgrade. I never would have escaped the world of child sex trafficking on the Stranger Danger wisdom.
During my psycho gyrations over the early Stranger Danger classes at my sons' elementary school, I went on a campaign of asking the neighborhood children to describe a stranger for me. The good news is that not a single child in the neighborhood was in danger of being kidnapped by Freddie Krueger or Cruella DeVille. Not a one of them would have spotted a real-time pimp, though.
Stranger Danger is as smart a propaganda campaign its kissing cousin, Zero Tolerance. Extremes seldom work out for a solid life plan.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8aqDT4KQBg&t=1397s