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I just heard a song that really spoke for me and the childhood events that led me here. Even though I'm a guy. Seems we talk about this to each other a lot, even down to the questions asked about PTSD and healing, like "can the damage be undone?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNpSfEDt6lg
Leave the Light lyrics Beth Hart
Daddy ain't that bad, he just plays rough
I ain't that scarred, when I'm covered up
I leave the light on I leave the light on
Little girl hiding underneath the bed
Was it something I did? Must be something I said
I leave the light on Better leave the light on
17, and I'm all messed up inside
I cut myself, just to feel alive
And I leave the light on I leave the light on
21 on the run, on the run, on the run
From myself, from myself and everyone
I leave the light on Better leave the light on
[Chorus ]
'Cause I wanna love And I wanna live
Yea, I don't know much about it And I never did
I don't know what to do Can the damage be undone?
I ain't that bad, I'm just messed up
I ain't that sad, but I'm sad enough
I still leave that light on
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNpSfEDt6lg
Leave the Light lyrics Beth Hart
Daddy ain't that bad, he just plays rough
I ain't that scarred, when I'm covered up
I leave the light on I leave the light on
Little girl hiding underneath the bed
Was it something I did? Must be something I said
I leave the light on Better leave the light on
17, and I'm all messed up inside
I cut myself, just to feel alive
And I leave the light on I leave the light on
21 on the run, on the run, on the run
From myself, from myself and everyone
I leave the light on Better leave the light on
[Chorus ]
'Cause I wanna love And I wanna live
Yea, I don't know much about it And I never did
I don't know what to do Can the damage be undone?
I ain't that bad, I'm just messed up
I ain't that sad, but I'm sad enough
I still leave that light on
ryverrat
That hits home. I still leave the lights on when I feel the past creeping in.
mujicaptsd
Me, too.Sometimes the TV on in my bedroom, at low volume, but just to have some light and some company on those kind of nights. Weird, huh?
DeliAnnem
Me too. However, I read that even the smallest amount of light can prevent deep sleep. So a eye mask (like in the B and W movies!) can help.
jewells1
Now that john is gone, I need to tv to quell the quiet. But before and a lot of times I can move safer in the dark...Like hiding in the darkness. Hard to be found that way. But I also don't deep sleep too often either.
mujicaptsd
I've got to think about getting a mask like you, Deli. Won't I look like Mr. Howell from Gilligan's Island then?
DeliAnnem
Better than Mrs. Howell.
deleted_user
that song really hits home, I don't like to sleep with the light on anymore, I embrace the darkness to sleep at night, but sometimes that small little light reminds me that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
mujicaptsd
becky, that sounds like a good light.
MillaSofia
Wow.
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