Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I just told Lilly that this painful week got worse today. I got up to go to the bathroom last night and fell in the dark and twisted my ankle. I ended up with an ankle sprain when I got out of bed in the morning. I'm not nimble on my feet anyway with the kidney disease nerve damage to my legs to begin with, so with the tender ankle sprain today I really hobbled on my cane.
I barely got in to teach classes, it was so hard to get from my car to class. But I had to do or die, because today happened to be the last day in which my boss would observe my teaching before I go up for tenure in January 2016.
I've been working for 5 years to go up for tenure, racking up all the good teaching observations and student evaluations of my teaching possible. Wrestling all 5 years with this kidney disease, and handling the pressure because kidney failure since 2010 won't let me take meds for PTSD when I get stressed any more. Talk about years of pressure to be a player willing to "play hurt" today, as a football coach would put it!
But I did it. I told the class I was "playing hurt" teaching class today, so to speak, and that I depended on them to carry me through, and they did. I got going and taught everything I had prepared and then some. I think my boss observed me fine.
I did that thanks to the prayers here from you all, knowing you had my back earlier this week in my post "Ouch TW," which turned out to be just Ouch Part 1. Thanks for those prayers, I couldn't do this without knowing you all are there for me. I live alone and have got nobody but you but it proved to be enough, so prayers of thanks back to each one of you!
I barely got in to teach classes, it was so hard to get from my car to class. But I had to do or die, because today happened to be the last day in which my boss would observe my teaching before I go up for tenure in January 2016.
I've been working for 5 years to go up for tenure, racking up all the good teaching observations and student evaluations of my teaching possible. Wrestling all 5 years with this kidney disease, and handling the pressure because kidney failure since 2010 won't let me take meds for PTSD when I get stressed any more. Talk about years of pressure to be a player willing to "play hurt" today, as a football coach would put it!
But I did it. I told the class I was "playing hurt" teaching class today, so to speak, and that I depended on them to carry me through, and they did. I got going and taught everything I had prepared and then some. I think my boss observed me fine.
I did that thanks to the prayers here from you all, knowing you had my back earlier this week in my post "Ouch TW," which turned out to be just Ouch Part 1. Thanks for those prayers, I couldn't do this without knowing you all are there for me. I live alone and have got nobody but you but it proved to be enough, so prayers of thanks back to each one of you!
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
Good for you! So proud to know you! Hope she writes up a good one and that your ankle feels better soon.
BTW, chilled arnica gel on sprains is nice for me. Also bruises. I use Arnicare brand, and it helps a little. And every ittle bit helps. OK, I just wrote a fortune cookie. Sorry.
Healing to you and your ankle. I sympathize. Purrrrz of healing and cheer to you! So glad you made it through the day! YAY!
I know you're very protective of your "no sick days" track record.
I wish you weren't in the position to have to make such a tough decision.
Feel better soon !
You have proved your heroic dedication to teaching and I hope your boss gets it. Sending heartfelt wishes that you catch a break!
Then you can plan on extra time for commute and allow for breaks to get you there on time. You supervisor will not hold it against you since it is a legitimate health reason.
Stress itself with out injury will mess with your sugar, there fore your kidneys.
You are not Superman, so drop the ego and go see the doc. Being alone and hurt is not good.
Hugs J.
Prayers ongoing, whichever way you take it. Keep your finger on the pulse.
I came back from the ER and made it to a curriculum committee meeting on time. They needed me there to have a quorum for a vote on new course changes at my community college. Sat next to a young instructor colleague who has been giving me the cold shoulder lately for reasons unknown. Just often takes opportunities to put on a sour face when I speak and lets me know what an old washed up relic I am. She did it again today, sneering at me when I showed up in crutches. When I sat down and arranged my crutches I said, happily, "made it!" She snarled, "good for you" with open sarcasm. Wow, what if I were on fire? I don't think she'd throw a glass of water on me to put me out.
On the other hand, one of the other young female instructors at the meeting teaches nursing. My crutches, apparently, hadn't been adjusted right for my height. She stayed after the meeting was over and adjusted them for me, and then walked me all the way to my car. The goodness didn't just stop there, either. When I got home, a neighbor whose name I don't even know, just seen her around, helped me get my briefcase out of my car and walked me to my apartment door. Which is amazing, because I live in a lower class pretty rough neighborhood.
Ya never know with people, huh? One was mean about my being on crutches, but two were nice, out of nowhere. Twice the nice.
Can get from point A to point B on crutches, and with cast protecting ankle, don't re-injure it with agony. Ah, self care! Yeah! Thanks, everybody.
But this time I'm pretty sure I'm not just chickening out, I'm just not sure I could handle a big stadium on crutches.
Anybody else struggle with self-isolating like I do?
So that means I'll go to this evening's potluck at the church where I preach and give PTSD talks, since it's in town. It was nice of them to invite me. That way I'm making SURE I'm not isolating.